MAFIA, KIDNEY STONE, and HE KNEW_ Lessons Not Lost

Time seems to slip away quickly, and although I have had MANY things I would have loved to blog about, other priorities have taken over and writing has been put on the back burner. But today my heart is full and I just need to share some of the things the Lord has given me to see/experience/hear.

MAFIA FOR GOOD
     The other day a sweet woman contacted Mr. Dashing to see if she could get a blessing set up for her daughter who was going into surgery the next day. We both made some calls to find another priesthood holder to help. Mr. Dashing dressed in his suit (as I knew he would) and with me attending and wanting to show respect for the priesthood blessing, dressed in a dress.
     We stopped by the home of another priesthood brother who has a pretty awesome story about his journey/becoming active in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. He came to the car--and I worried that he might feel bad because of how we were dressed. After some time in the car he asked Mr. Dashing if he had just gotten off work or just liked to be in a suit. The answer came that Mr. Dashing tried to dress in a white shirt and tie when administrating in the priesthood whenever possible. That was new news to this brother and he said he had never heard of it. But the conversation was left at that.
     We went into the home and after some good conversation, these two priesthood brethren laid their hands on the 30 year old's head and gave her a blessing of strength, peace and comfort for the next day surgery.
     After the blessing was given, this good brother, Ed, placed his hands on the shoulders of the young woman and testified to her about the blessing of receiving a blessing before surgery. He showed his scars on his head from a brain surgery and this good sweet man testified that he knew that no matter what happened the next day--he knew Jesus would be with her.  I was touched by his powerful, simple testifying of what he knew to be true. The words out of this rough and tough pictures up and down the arms, large man--touched me.
     We drove home with the spirit and asked Ed some different questions. He said that he had recently gone through the temple and that there was no turning back now. That He, then he proceeded to jab Mr. Dashing and then pointed back to me-- that we ALL were now solders for God because we had all been through the temple. That no matter what our priesthood holders said/asked, ours was to follow and serve. I smiled as I listened to his love of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I thanked Heavenly Father for a man that was so willing and worthy to use the priesthood of God at a moments notice.
     Moments before arriving at his home Ed said, "I love the gospel! It is like being in the Mafia for GOOD!" He then explained in the mafia (I didn't ask him how he was so attached to the Mafia-- :) maybe a story for another day) you might get a call to do something needed at 2 am--and you just go and do it. In The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints-- whenever you get a call to do good (this day it was at 6:30 at night) you just go and do it! I smiled with his die heart conviction to the gospel of Jesus Christ and his commitment to be a solider for God.
     Ed got out of the car and as he went to shut the door he said the next time he would be dressed appropriately and have a shirt and tie on. He said it was the first he had heard of it, but he said he would do the same. We later heard that he chatted with bishop in asking him if one should wear a shirt and tie for administering a blessing. Bishop mentioned that whenever possible--that dressing for the priesthood was best. Ed then told Bishop he would do it. ...:) Oh this man who is in the Mafia for GOOD! ;) Warmed my heart and left me praising God. Great example to both Mr. Dashing and myself.

KIDNEY STONE

Elder and Sister Cloward - Joberg Africa

     I was chatting with my dad and mom the other day over facetime. Amen for the internet FINALLY in their African home! Makes communicating without glitches--so much nicer!
     I asked how their fast Sunday had been to which Dad replied, great and horrible. They had the missionaries over for dinner, but dad had become very uneasy with a sharp pain attacking him. A kidney stone! He did his best to be a host with much pacing. A few times he laid on his stomach and had my mom knee his back to help move the kidney stone along. Sometimes she was successful which resulted in 30 mins of rest/sleep--but followed by intense pain, pacing the floors, mopping and doing anything else to keep his mind distracted. I have had my own kidney stone before so I knew in general what my dad was going through.
     But the miracle of this agonizing moment was an aw-ha given to him through the spirit. See, early that morning as he and my mom were fasting for all of us in the family--my dad had been pondering over the sacrament prayers.
     As Latter-Day Saints, each Sunday we partake of bread that has been broken and blessed which represents Christ's body and also we partake of water that represents the blood he shed for each of us. As members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints--when we are baptized, we promise to take upon us Jesus Christ's name (that is--try to do as He would do/live/be). We covenant to serve and love others, to keep His commandments, to mourn with those who mourn, comfort/support/care for those in need. We also are baptized because even Christ (our sinless brother) was baptized to fulfill all righteousness/follow what was asked by Heavenly Father.
     Our baptism is a symbol/outward expression of our inner commitment to the gospel of Jesus Christ. We believe that one must be baptized by someone who holds the priesthood authority (authority to act in God's name) to preform the sacred ordinance. When we are baptized, it is symbolic of putting away our old life, of whatever it was/is, and being "born again"-- to God. That means committing to keep and live His commandments. In doing so, we believe we receive a remission of our sins. That through the atonement of Christ, we are cleansed and clean- without any spot.
     After we are baptized we are confirmed a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. And with that confirmation (again only done by those who have authority given them by God to do the ordinance of laying their hands upon our head) we are told to "receive the Holy Ghost".
     We believe by living/striving to repent each day and trying to keep the commandments we can have the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost--the third member of the Godhead--whose job is to testify of truth, of Jesus Christ, and of Heavenly Father. Also he leads us and comforts us. Okay... back to the sacrament.
     If baptism in part is for a remission for our sins--and each of us sin every day because we are not perfect--then logically we should just stay in a baptismal font and NEVER get out because we would need to be baptized all the time! Right?! No, we are not to live in a font. But why it is so important to a Latter-Day Saint to attend church every week-- is that is where we partake of the sacrament, the bread and water representing Christ's body and blood that was shed for us-- and through that partaking of those emblems, we renew our baptismal covenants.
     So IF we partake the bread and water with a repentant heart, and we seek to be better and strive again to live as God would have us live--it is as IF we are being "baptized" each Sunday--we start our week fresh and clean, un spotted-- and ready to "KEEP TRYING/STRIVING" to do what we have promised God we would do.
     That is just a little back ground--- so back to my dad, he was pondering over the broken bread which is in similitude (represents) Christ's body that was broken and bruised for each of us. As my dad pondered about it--he said he just didn't get it. That perhaps there was something more "deep" then the bread physically representing all Christ gave us with his physical life/living. During the administration of the sacrament my dad asked God to help him better understand the broken bread.
    Well--that night, prayer answered! For after he had suffered through the attacks of the kidney stone, he felt that the attack was in direct answer to his pleading to better understand the Savior's physical suffering. That He [Jesus Christ] truly has felt all of our heartache and sorrows as well as our physical agonies.
     My dad believed he was given that brief encounter with a kidney stone as a tender mercy into a request to better understand.

    My father's words got me thinking. He said mom already was "clued" into what the bread meant by what she has had to endure... but it was just coming to me. I pondered it all week and then the Lord gave me the Ryerse's talks...

HE KNEW--SO I HAD PEACE
     This past Sunday brought a talk by Brother and Sister Ryerse. The words have stuck with me--and moved me. Sister Ryerse said that growing up she had pretty bad kidneys and had to go into the hospital often for treatments. Finally at 11 years old they decided to try a surgery to help correct/fix whatever was wrong with her kidneys. It sounds like it was a pretty risky procedure. And even at 11 she could remember feeling great anxiety and fear over the surgery. But she was given a blessing and was reminded that the Savior had already felt all the pain she would be going through/have--He knew exactly what she was facing... and although she didn't know how the outcome would be, she went into the surgery as a 11 year old with peace knowing that the Savior had already felt/knew what she was going through. (*Miracle--the surgery was a great success !! and shortly after her surgery the medical world stopped preforming that type of surgery because what there had been too many fatal outcomes with the procedure. She had been protected and preserved.)
     Brother Ryerse talked about the struggles of dating Melanie (Sister Ryerse) because her mom was so set on that HE was not the right one for HER daughter. Apparently the mother in law caused many tears and heartache as Sister Ryerse had received revelation from God to move forward with brother Ryerse in marriage but her mother was not supporting/would not have it.
     Brother Ryerse then said he had a profound dream while they were dating that he was sitting with Melanie's mom and expressing all the reasons he loved her daughter but she would not have it. And the more questions she asked the more Brother Ryerse tried to answer them but was left short handed by being able to satisfy any of the accusations of the mother in law to be. At the end of the dream, Melanie's mom stated to Brother Ryerse that in time things would be okay. He held to that--- and although it sounds like quite a bit of a "hell" in their dating process and probably a bit into their marriage--over time (several years and 4 kids into the marriage) it has been okay.
     Both talks were BEAUTIFUL examples of faith and perseverance/trusting in God-- even with great odds.

SOOO why is this all touching? My dad's experience and Melanie's-- I have never written on here because there are so many of my friends who's timing for marriage and/or children have not come to fruit yet-- My time for marriage was at age 30, and a time for our first child is apparently at age 31--close to 32. Our little guy is due Sept 28th.
     I can't even express all the feelings and emotions I have gone through, that both Mr. Dashing and I have been through in the last 29 weeks, let alone the almost year of marriage.
      And the next two 1/2 months, no doubt, we will yet experience many more things in regards to being parents and raising our little one to God.
     I have been at times brought to my knees in pure fear for labor and delivery--as well of needing to wear the mother hat.
     After serving a mission in New Jersey, when I came home I found myself weeping every time I was around children. It was sometimes out of control and outright feeling of ridiculous. I longed to teach my own little ones about Jesus Christ and God's plan for them, that God hears and answer's prayers, that we lived with him before we came here to this earth, and this earth life, in big measure is learning to be obedient to the commandments of God so we can yet again, return and live with our Heavenly Father. These thoughts would consume me when I was around little children. Sooo MUCH that I had to prayed to have my heart locked from so many tender emotions. (Yeah, not sure if that was wise or not) but lock my heart He did because I finally STOPPED weeping when I was around children. YEA!
     Yes I wanted to be a mother, but because that did not seem to be in my current life plans--I moved on. I strived to do everything within my power to be God's tool as a single person. I don't say this for bragging or to be "seen" a certain way--I am just writing how I choose to deal with my dreams of wife and family not coming in my time table. I certainly didn't want to just do nothing because what "I thought was best" was not coming to past. So I choose to focus on what I could or what I felt God would have me do when the blessings I had sought for were not on the horizon for nearly 10 years....
    But here, now, with the reality growing inside of me (literally with kicks and jabs-our little man is surely going to be a great swimmer like his dad) and the truth that if it is God's will, we will have a little bundle in our arms in the not too distant future---the thought of labor, delivery, and motherhood IS such an awesome monster, or I should, HAS been a monster.
     I have taken comfort in knowing the world has been populated for thousands of years by women doing what just freaks me out to do, and in a large part they have succeeded. But what my fears were not allowing me to realize--came in my dad's and Mel's experiences... the realization/aw-ha that Jesus Christ has already felt what I have been through and will yet go through. That my situation, no matter how closely related to someone else's, Jesus Christ is the one who will know exactly what I am facing. And although I don't know outcomes or have any clue to the pains to be physically felt and emotional/mental ones that will come with the motherhood package--HE DOES. HE KNOWS! And in HIM knowing, my heart takes great peace in knowing there is no part of this journey He has not already walked/ is ready to re-walk with me...!
     Yes, I know I am slow on the bandwagon and these truths I have already realized in other areas of my life, but like reading a scripture for the 100th time and finding something completely new or just pressed to the mind in a different light--this aw-ha is amazing! And this week I am facing the future with a determined peace of mind and confidence....
     I am so grateful for where I live. For the people who have been placed on my path-- for all those who have already dived into motherhood that have been great examples.
  
     To all those who find that the dreams they have so long dreamed that have not come true--but they still are giving their all to God and trying to trust in His timing, how beautiful their examples are to me.

     I am not sure why Mr. Dashing was saved/prepared for me. Some days he is more celestial than I know what to do with. And I am not sure why we have been given this time to have a family--but I know that whatever path each of us are on, if we will trust in God (who has our best interest at the center of His entire existence) we will never have to face/do what we are asked to do--alone. For our exact path (whatever it is in life) has been walked by the Redeemer of all mankind. And if one chooses to have faith in Him, despite the unknowns, that someone truly can live in/with peace and hope, regardless of what the outcomes/happenings of their individual journeys may bring.

Today I am rejoicing in people who testify about being God's solider, in white shirts and ties with men willing and worthy to serve in/with the priesthood. I rejoice in beautiful examples given to me of the personal lives of others, which move me in the direction of faith--because of them living their faith!

Happiness is God placing a new piece into the puzzles before my eternal soul's journey. 

I am grateful for prayer, and repentance and the chance to become better than I am.

...BE GLAD!

Last night in institute our studies brought us to section 29. I have studied section 29 before, but as we read verses 31 and particularly 32 my mind opened up to what is probably an obvious insight, but the symbolism was new for me.

Doctrine and Covenants 29:31-32 reads:

For by the power of my Spirit created I them; yea, all things both spiritual and temporal—

First spiritual, secondly temporal, which is the beginning of my work; and again, first temporal, and secondly spiritual, which is the last of my work—

So the order in that second verse is:

Phase 1
1st - SPIRITUAL
2nd - TEMPORAL

then the order changes

Phase 2
1st - TEMPORAL
2nd - SPIRITUAL

With phase 1, we were all created 1st spiritual before ever coming to earth. God prepared a way to have an earth life for us = 2nd temporal. Phase 2 -- born into this earth life we full fill
the "1st" and become "temporal" with our new bodies. And because of the veil placed over our minds we now, on/in this earth life, need to full fill the 2nd and become once again Spiritual! A complete Beautiful circle [square picture-but I think you get the idea]!


So again...this earth life is about becoming Spiritual beings yet again. For we were once! And we have all finished steps 1 and 2 of phase 1 for we all were created spiritually and given a plan for mortality. And we have all finished the 1st step of phase 2 by becoming temporal--for surely our being born in into this life with bodies that age and fall apart, we have accomplished becoming temporal first. NOW for the 2nd step of this journey--becoming spiritual once again, THUS preparing us to be able to live in the Kingdom of Heaven.

I know there are a lot more applications with those verses, but I thought it was a beautiful reminder of what I am to be doing. Christ says:

Lift up your hearts and be glad, for I am in your midst, and am your advocate with the Father; and it is his good will to give you the kingdom.

This life is NOW about becoming spiritual yet again. The Lord's council to David Whitmer is a good reminder to me! Doctrine and Covenants Section 30:

Behold, I say unto you, David, that you have feared man and have not relied on me for strength as you ought.

But your mind has been on the things of the earth more than on the things of me, your Maker…

I often fear man and forget that I am to RELY on Jesus Christ for strength. And too often I fall into the temporal trap of focusing on things that are temporal= having my mind be on "the things of the earth more than the things of [my] Maker"!

Well it's a new day!! And I am all about making my brown arrow--become and achieving white -- the 2nd step of phase 2. To become spiritual once again!!

Jesus is the Christ! He lives! -- And I know it!

"JESUS HEARS ME"

For whatever reason on Saturday I listened to this song over and over. I had many things I needed to get done. My morning was basking in the spirit of the scriptures. (Mostly I think because Brother Murray called me and asked me to give a talk the next day.) But then I felt a stirring that I needed to put this video together. I love the story click here to read the full article. It is amazing!! I also love the song.

When I went through the article, I found that I had lots of things to put into the movie. And as I looked at the amount of text--I became a little overwhelmed with how in the world it was all going to work out... especially on my ghetto imovie application. After most of my day and a good chunk into the late evening this is the result. I found some mistakes-- of course, but I do feel the movie is not from me, but just a good reminder from God. If you would like to watch the larger version on YouTube click here.

SUNDAY
Yesterday was pretty sacred. From the moment I woke up, it was a day that filled my soul.

Gavi for the first time came to RS! Or rather we stayed long enough for her to go. Danny had to sit on my lap the whole time and Jose was a sticky mess because we were trying to keep him chill with suckers and toostie rolls. But she was there! It was the first time she had ever been to RS. Very cool. The sacrament in her ward was sacred and brother Carter shared some choice miraculous blessings he had received in his life. He did not want to share because of the sacred nature of the healing, but felt impressed he must share. It was beautiful.

Then off to my ward. Sam stopped me in the hall and told me I must meet his sister and family. Sunday was a big day for he and Kristi as they delivered a powerful lesson on virtue, modesty, overcoming pornography... the spirit was present and there were a lot of people there that day. And I was privileged to meet his family. How is it that his family can show such quick love for someone they don't even know? I told Sam that I thought he was one of a kind, but after meeting his sisters--the same greatness which is in him, flows in them as well. I was deeply touched by their wanting to meet me. Good, choice family.

I was ready to give my talk, until I saw the Stake President walk in. Oh that man lifts you to another level of life. And when I saw him walk in I thought it would be good if I was "sick". ha, no I am just kidding, but really the man is of God.

After the movie was finished early Sunday morning, I fell to sleep with thoughts and impressions with what I needed to share. In the morning with only 20 mins, I typed out the scriptures and headed to my first ward. So by the time it was for me to talk, I had not officially "talked" through my talk. I did have deep impressions with what God would have me say.

How touched I was to sit next to the high council member. I whispered to him that since they asked me to speak the day before, I had been praying deeply for he and I and that our tongues would be loosed. He smiled and said he had been doing the same but then also added he had been praying for the hearts in the congregation. I smiled and told him I had been doing that too. (NOTE: How cool to get to speak with a high council member that prays like that! it was humbling and encouraging...I was filled with great faith and peace.)

The day before as I was praying, I had a strong impression I must go to see Jinger the next night. Well after the course of that prayer I found out that my mom and Nyk were coming to my place Sunday night. So Sunday morning I knelt down and asked God what I should do--just leave them at my house because I knew I would be with Jinger for some time. I felt if I needed to, to just bring them along, but that I needed to be at Jinger's house around 9:30 pm.

Nyk called me in the day and she felt not to come down, and mom decided she would not come down too. I had not told either one of them that I would not be there to entertain/hang out with them, but in faith knew that God would make it all right. I truly had no attachments and could follow through and go to Jinger's house... for whatever reason I was to.

I got home from some church things. I had a little dinner and then started to study the scriptures. By 8 pm I was very sleepy. (Partly from the intensity of the night before.) I had the thought that I could take a quick nap. BUT OH NO-- I thought, there was no way, I know myself, and so strong was the impression to go to Jinger's place that I dared not sleep through it. But sweetly, as the spirit often does, I was reassured that God would wake me up. The impression was so clear that I closed my scriptures and went to sleep.

9:25 my phone rings and I am "drunk" with sleep. It was Kristi. We talked, but I am pretty sure I did not make lots of sense. But we were on the phone long enough to wake me up so I could jump in my car and go to Jinger's place. I am so grateful for her phone call and God truly (as he always does) kept his promise of waking me up. (Which anyone who knows me, knows that it is only God or the spirit that can do this great task! I am a great sleeper. I know I know, eat it up now, because when I am a mother, there is no such luxury. ;))

No one was home at Jinger's place, but I knew God wanted me there. Jinger has some heavy drug activity going on next store and a neighbor that through some un appropriate actions has caused her to not be outside with her kids when he is around. I saw the neighbors in their garage and I had the impression that I was there just to help Jinger get in the house. (Brytt has been gone with Dad and the boys to Alaska.)

I finally called Jinger. She was on her way home from Salt Lake. She had had the impression to go and see her sister. But she reminded the Lord if she did that, she would have to come home when it was dark, and leave children in the car because she could only take 2 in at a time if they were asleep. She does not like to come home in the dark because of her neighbors. But she followed and had faith God would protect her and her family. I told her I was sitting outside her house to which the just praised heavenly Father. She did not have to leave her children in the car un attended that night.

--

God really knows us. He knows what we need and he knows how to bless us. He provides for his children.

I was reminded of this again as dad gave me a sweet blessing this morning.

How I long to be who He wants me to be. And my desires are not true unless they match His desires. I know that God can change us.. he can change me and make me better than I am right now.

"Rejoice the Lord is King"! (That is what I am doing!)

How can I keep--from singing?!

HOPE SMILING BRIGHTLY BEFORE US - DELIVERANCE IS NIGH

The past few weeks I have been studying in D&C on the signs of the times, and what is to come. I must admit, I have gone through all the emotions. While reading D&C 45 I became a little bit of a nervous wreck. As I read deeper into the things that are to come, my heart became sick and full of despair. I found myself thinking it would be nice to not be on the earth when all the calamities are here in their fullness. As I read I found my heart crying, "Alas, my master, how shall I stay!"

I did not speak to anyone about this for several days. As it happened, my scripture study took 4 or 5 days just to get through D&C 45. I can honestly say, my hope was slipping away and I had no idea how to have faith in the future in the prophecies which should come. How can anyone survive what is to come?! I pondered over those that I love. All my sisters in RS, and I wondered if the time were to come now, would I have the faith enough to support them through all the hard things. I seriously doubted I would be able to keep my "cool" and keep unwavering upbeat faith.

But as I finished reading D&C 45 I kept asking in my heart that there had to be hope somewhere? But mine seemed to be all gone.

For verily I say unto you, that great things await you;

Ye hear of wars in foreign lands; but, behold, I say unto you, they are nigh, even at your doors, and not many years hence ye shall hear of wars in your own lands.

Like the Miracle of Forgiveness by Spencer W. Kimball--Heavenly Father sent the hope at the end of the chapter. I don't ever remember being taught this, but the verses gave me HOPE!

And it shall be called the New Jerusalem, a bland of peace, a city of refuge, a place of safety for the saints of the Most High God;

And the glory of the Lord shall be there, and the terror of the Lord also shall be there, insomuch that the wicked will not come unto it, and it shall be called Zion.

And it shall come to pass among the wicked, that every man that will not take his sword against his neighbor must needs flee unto Zion for safety.

And there shall be gathered unto it out of every nation under heaven; and it shall be the only people that shall not be at war one with another.

And it shall be said among the wicked: Let us not go up to battle against Zion, for the inhabitants of Zion are terrible; wherefore we cannot stand.

And it shall come to pass that the righteous shall be gathered out from among all nations, and shall come to Zion, singing with songs of everlasting joy.

I love that it is said that the wicked will say, "Let us not go up to battle against Zion, for the inhabitants of Zion are terrible; wherefore we cannot stand." !!! For some reason, I did not think that "Zion" would be established until after the world was totally burned. I have never done the study on this--and boy was I messed up in thinking, but I thought when the New Jerusalem would be here after the wicked had been burned. But here it says that the glory and the terror of the Lord would be in this city and the wicked would not dare come unto it. And yet with all the wicked killing each other, there would be songs of singing of everlasting joy sung by those in the city even with the killing all around about!!! I don't profess to understand these scriptures or the order of events fully, but surely I am not misinterpreting that there will be a place of refuge while there is wickedness still on the earth. And those dwelling there will have peace and joy!!

As I read those words in D&C, after nearly feeling like I was going to collapse with fear for the future--my fear was immediately replaced with hope. And not just some hope, but my hope was and has been BRIGHT! There is hope, bright hope for our future!!! I under stand the words in the hymn, "hope smiling brightly before us, for we know that deliverance is nigh". Hope IS smiling brightly before us!

I loved these words from the D&C student manual p. 98 -

In the scriptures four words seem closely related to
the concept of Zion: gathering, preparation, defense,
and refuge. The tribulations and judgments that will
be poured out upon the world prior to the Second
Coming will be so extensive and devastating that if
the Lord did not prepare a means of preservation,
His people too would perish. But He has prepared a
means for His people to escape those terrible times;
that means is Zion. Enoch was told that the Lord
would preserve His people in the tribulations of the
last days by gathering His elect to Zion where they
could gird up their loins (prepare themselves) and
look forward to His coming (see Moses 7:61–62). In
an earlier revelation in the Doctrine and Covenants,
the Savior called the elders of the Church to gather
the elect so their hearts could be prepared for the day
of tribulation (see D&C 29:7–8). In 1838 the Lord
explained that the gathering to Zion and her stakes
was to be for defense and refuge from the coming
storm that will be poured out on the earth (see
D&C 115:5–6). These commands and promises are
found also in section 45. The Saints are to gather to
Zion (see D&C 45:64–65), a place of safety, peace, and
refuge (see v. 65). Even though the rest of the world
is in a state of horrible warfare (see v. 68), in Zion
(D&C 115:5–6 implies that this includes her stakes)
there will be peace and joy (see D&C 45:69–71).
The Prophet Joseph Smith taught: “Without Zion,
and a place of deliverance, we must fall; because the
time is near when the sun will be darkened, and the
moon turn to blood, and the stars fall from heaven,
and the earth reel to and fro. Then, if this is the case,
and if we are not sanctified and gathered to the
places God has appointed, with all our former
professions and our great love for the Bible, we must
fall; we cannot stand; we cannot be saved; for God
will gather out his Saints from the Gentiles, and then
comes desolation and destruction, and none can
escape except the pure in heart who are gathered.”
(Teachings, p. 71)

I love - "...He has prepared a means for His people to escape those terrible times..." And this morning in my reading I read another great quote. Harold B. Lee said:

"The Lord has clearly placed the
responsibility for directing the work of gathering in
the hands of the leaders of the Church, to whom He
will reveal His will where and when such gatherings
would take place in the future. It would be well,
before the frightening events concerning the
fulfillment of all God’s promises and predictions
are upon us, that the Saints in every land prepare
themselves and look forward to the instruction that
shall come to them from the First Presidency of this
church as to where they shall be gathered. They
should not be disturbed in their feelings until such
instruction is given to them as it is revealed by the
Lord to the proper authority.” (Ye Are the Light of the
World, p. 167.)

HOPE HOPE HOPE AND HOPE!!!!!!!!!!! I no longer feel this panic and fear for our future. I don't even know if I will be living in the fullness of these prophesies. The difference for me now, is that I am now OKAY/and HOPE-FILLED for the time ahead. And yea if the Lord would let me live in such a time. Never the less, His will be done.

Heavenly Father is the master architect. His blue prints include every bolt and nut needed to complete our lives and destinies. He has enough lumber to build my soul/heart securely. His plan included the sacrifice of Son, Jesus Christ, so that His completed plans of me, could become and be a masterpiece. His blue prints are not hidden away, but are fully laid open before us all. The scriptures, our P-blessing, the temple, the living prophets and apostles.

There is hope smiling brightly before us. And I have just read about the ways that His deliverance IS nigh!

My heart is full of Hope!

Bryndi

BACK TO THE WATER HOLE

Today is the day!

My uncle Paul knows how much I love photography and nature--so for quite some time he has been forwarding me one of his co-work's brother's photography emails. It has been such a treat to look at all the amazing shots of Kent Keller, the photographer. It has been even more fun to know that he is shooting these pictures close to home! Last week he just sent in shots of some of Utah's mountain goats!

Well back in July, my uncle Paul forwarded me one of Kent's latest adventures with some wild horses. This email was a little different in that Kent wrote about his experience. I read his email a handful of times, for so deep was the application. I contacted Kent to make sure it was okay if I shared his email and pictures here on my blog. He graciously said yes. So with his permission, I share his email.

>>> Kent Keller 7/12/2009 7:29 AM >>>
Spent a hot and dusty July 7th with wild horses. I got shots of a normally very shy, beautiful palomino stud, a horse splashing water on a nasty bite wound, a swimming colt in over his head and rescued a little buckskin filly that got caught on the wrong side of a fence from her mom and band. By the time I found her she was so stressed she was trembling uncontrollably and kept falling down. When I got her back with her mom the band ran a mile to the water hole. It took the filly 30 minutes to reach the water. She fell down and laid still for almost three hours. She seemed fine after that.

When I read in his email that he caught a picture of a horse splashing water on the nasty bite--did you notice how big the wound was?! (You can click on the picture for a bigger view. I would love for my pictures to upload bigger on the blog, but I am kind of blog illiterate, so if anyone knows how to make these pictures upload big on the blog, I would love to know!) Did you see how big the wound was?!

I immediately thought to how the Savior is living water. If you come to Him you can be healed! The horse's instinct was to splash water on the wound. Or perhaps he just thought it might feel better. BOTH are true for the Savior! I forgot to ask Kent if the 3rd photograph down is the same horse. If it is, from that angle, you can't see the wound on the horse.

So many times, many of us have wounds that are sometimes hidden from others views, some wounds are deep, some are old but are still festering, some wounds seem insignificant compared to others--but all wounds whether the wound of not forgiving, holding a grudge, pride, envy, jealousy, the wound of hate, lack of faith, bitterness, resentment, blame, abuse, criticism--all these wounds, insignificant or not, if not cleansed with LIVING WATER, our Savior, they can become festering sores. Sores that take away our peace, destroy our hope, and most times influence/set a bad example/attitude for those around us.

The horse splashed water upon a nasty bite. The Savior is the living water. He is the healer of all wounds. Back to the thought of the pools of Bethesda when the water moved, the first person in it was made whole of whatever infirmity they had. The Savior's water is always moving.

Am I willing to let Him take a look at my wounds?

When you first clean out a wound, it can be quite painful. Sheri Dew says, the Savior heals without a scar. Will I let Him heal me? Do I immerse myself and my wounds in/with His love and His mercy and His wisdom? He can heal-- will I allow Him to heal me?

I loved the picture of the swimming colt who was way in over his head. Sometimes the choices I make put me way in over my head. Oh how many times has the Savior come to rescue me?! How many times have my visiting teachers come and shared a message with me that I needed. A coworker, a boss, a father or a mother, how many times has the Lord sent them to aid me in my swimming mess?!

Kent's last story left me filled with the spirit. His story about the Filly on the other side of the fence. I asked Kent how he had gotten the Filly back to her mom and band. He said he cut a whole in the fence and coaxed her towards her mom.

This Filly found herself separated from the ones she loved the most. And because she had been separated so long/distressed for so long when Kent found her she was trembling uncontrollably. Our choices can separate us from God and can cause us great distress. So much distress that our agency can be taken away and we are left to tremble uncontrollably in our consequences.

I wonder if she was even more freaked out when Kent, a human (and she a wild little filly) tried to get close enough to help her.

Do I freak out when someone I love is trying to help me get back on the right side of the fence?

God gives us "Kents" all along our fences to help us back to the path. These Kents are our priesthood leaders, the church, faithful-sincere-mighty prayer, scriptures, our living prophet, home teachers/visiting teaching, temple covenants, paying a faithful tithe--all of these are tools to help us get back to our "Heavenly" band. All of these are to help us have/enjoy true happiness.

Many times when we fall on the side of the fence we should not be on, it is sometimes hard to do the things/take the actions to come back. But it is so worth it.

I was intrigued by the fact that when this filly was back with her mother - it still took her 30 mins to travel a mile to the water whole. And when she got there she collapsed for several hours. Sometimes our journey back to the Savior, our living water, may take a little longer...and that's okay! Our weaknesses and our areas for improvement don't fix over night. But He can start to soften our heart immediately! We need to be patient with our one step at a time. We need the Savior and the atonement to become whole. We need the water hole!

So if you know of someone who is stuck on the other side of the fence don't give up on them!

I want to be a Kent! I want to be the one helping cut the hole and coasting someone back on the path remembering that they might be slow at first.

I was touched by the filly's determination to get to the water hole. And when she got there, so long had her journey of hardships that it just took her a little longer recovery to jump back into the full swing of the band.

So it is for me! When I have been walking a road that is not in harmony with the spirit, it may take me a little longer to get back into the full swing of the gospel. But thank goodness Heavenly Father will send me Kents along my way! Thank goodness for good friends, loving parents/family, an amazing boss, and a great bishop who are like Kent cutting a whole in the fence. I am still the one that must chose whether I am going to walk through the opening.

All of this from Kent's photography eye! And today was finally the day I was able to share it with you!

I know that the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is Christ's true church on the earth. I know the Savior lives and loves us. He and our Heavenly Father will never give up on us. An though we may be trembling on the other side of the fence, they will make a way for us to escape and/or conquer whatever is not in harmony with the gospel in our lives. It is ours to endure to the end... In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

LIFE IS GOOD!

I love Mormon chapter 9! Vs 27 was the cause great reflection today.

27 O then despise not, and wonder not, but hearken unto the words of the Lord, and ask the Father in the name of Jesus for what things soever ye shall stand in need. Doubt not, but be believing, and begin as in times of old, and come unto the Lord with all your heart, and work out your own salvation with fear and trembling before him.

Don’t despise or wonder
BUT
Harken and Ask
Doubt not
Be believing
Come to the Lord with all your heart
Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.

Love lists in the scriptures!

Today the word “shall” stood out to me. We are not told to ask for things only IF something comes up that we will need... we are told to ask for those things that we “shall stand in need” of. I know, I know, a real duh moment, but for me, it is like the Lord is letting me in on a “brief” for my life. “Bryn, you SHALL/WILL be in need of things, so make sure you ask for what you ARE in need of.” Times in the past, times now, and times to come, we will/shall have things we will/shall stand in need of.

Need of:
-faith to follow a prompting
-help to forgive
-knowledge to understand His will
-a way to get to the temple when our week is just going nuts
-help to make it through a stressful day/year/week
-help to overcome temptations
-guidance to make the right decisions
-loved ones to be blessed
-compassion
-mercy
-kindness
-getting through a semester of school
-work project
-help working with those who use their agency poorly
-help to know what to say to a guy when he calls (ha, I put that in there for all of us singles out there!) ha ha
-balance in our life
-patience with ourselves
-even more patience at times with others
...the list goes on and on and on and on and on!

We are going to stand in need of a lot of things. We will/shall!

We need to harken, and then ask.

I had a friend once ask why we need to ask God for things. After all He is our Father, He is all knowing...He already knows what we need and don’t need. But time and time again in the scriptures we are commanded to “ask”. In asking, we receive and build faith!

I have heard many times, “I don’t have the faith that it takes to pray.”

I disagree.

Aminadab teaches us a powerful lesson on praying. Hel 5:41 (The Book of Mormon).

Nephi and Lehi were cast into prison and had horrible things happen to them. They went “many” days without food (12). The servants of Limhi went to go slay them, but Nephi and Lehi were surrounded by fire. The earth shook, the bad guys trembled, a darkness comes and over shadows those in the prison. They all hear a voice 3 different times telling them to repent.

Those in the prison were pretty scared.

The scriptures tell us that Aminadab was a Nephite by birth and he once belonged to the church of God [he was a member but for whatever reason], but fell away (vs. 35).

During the time when the darkness was engulfing the men in the prison, they asked Aminadab what they could do to have the darkness lifted:

http://scriptures.lds.org/en/hel/5

40 And it came to pass that the Lamanites said unto him: What shall we do, that this cloud of darkness may be removed from overshadowing us?
41 And Aminadab said unto them: You must repent, and cry unto the voice, even until ye shall have faith in Christ, who was taught unto you by Alma, and Amulek, and Zeezrom; and when ye shall do this, the cloud of darkness shall be removed from overshadowing you.
42 And it came to pass that they all did begin to cry unto the voice of him who had shaken the earth; yea, they did cry even until the cloud of darkness was dispersed.
43 And it came to pass that when they cast their eyes about, and saw that the cloud of darkness was dispersed from overshadowing them, behold, they saw that they were encircled about, yea every soul, by a pillar of fire.
44 And Nephi and Lehi were in the midst of them; yea, they were encircled about; yea, they were as if in the midst of a flaming fire, yet it did harm them not, neither did it take hold upon the walls of the prison; and they were filled with that joy which is unspeakable and full of glory.
45 And behold, the Holy Spirit of God did come down from heaven, and did enter into their hearts, and they were filled as if with fire, and they could speak forth marvelous words.
46 And it came to pass that there came a voice unto them, yea, a pleasant voice, as if it were a whisper, saying:
47 Peace, peace be unto you, because of your faith in my Well Beloved, who was from the foundation of the world.
48 And now, when they heard this they cast up their eyes as if to behold from whence the voice came; and behold, they saw the heavens open; and angels came down out of heaven and ministered unto them.
49 And there were about three hundred souls who saw and heard these things; and they were bidden to go forth and marvel not, neither should they doubt.
50 And it came to pass that they did go forth, and did minister unto the people, declaring throughout all the regions round about all the things which they had heard and seen, insomuch that the more part of the Lamanites were convinced of them, because of the greatness of the evidences which they had received.

Okay, so I know I included the whole little blurb here, but it is such a good story! We even get to hear Heavenly Father speaking!

Did you catch in vs 41? Aminadab told the people in the prison they needed to “...repent, and cry unto the voice, even until ye shall have faith in Christ...” He didn’t say, “Use your faith TO cry/pray unto the Lord” He said repent, and pray/cry -UNTIL YE SHALL HAVE FAITH IN CHRIST--! When we pray, we gain/receive faith!

What a lesson for me when I have darkness shadowing areas in my life. Whether it is my own darkness brought on as consequences to my actions or the darkness brought about by others’ choices, or just the darkness of the day - no job, no money, no family, no kids, no love, no hope--whatever darkness I am facing... I can repent (for me it is usually about the grumbling/complaining/murmuring I do while in my particular darkness) and CRY unto Heavenly Father, and if I don't already have faith, I will gain faith faith in Christ through my prayers! Faith that eventually the darkness will be lifted.

Oh the wisdom of Aminadab! I always wonder how his story ends, does he make amends and comes back into the Gospel light?! Oh the power of the one!...for another day I will have to explore this Aminadab, a member of the church, obviously not active at the time of this amazing prison experience, but he was able to dig up and hold onto his spiritual/gospel roots again. He had the faith to speak up and tell his prison-mates what they needed to do. Had he remembered the his mother singing a song to help him remember, "We believe that the first principles and ordinances of the Gospel are: first, Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ; second, Repentance; third, Baptism by immersion for the remission of sins; fourth, Laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost." :D (Fourth Article of Faith). What ever came back to him, someone had taught him something about the gospel and he was able to teach the whole prison how to pray! That had to have taken guts! Ah, for another day.

DO NOT FEAR - LIFE IS GOOD

This is something I have hesitated to share, for it is very sacred to me, but I share it in feeling I should. This happened to me while I was serving a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. In sacredness I share this story.

New Jersey-Elizabeth-Morristown Mission
An Excerpt from my family email, with details added from my journals…11/3/05

I was sitting studding at my desk reading in the Book of Mormon about how all the people in the land gathered into one body so they could protect their selves from the Gadianton robbers. As I read and pondered on the story, I became really aware to the idea that there are tons of evil spirits all around us. I then started to wonder how many Satan had on me!? Fear came into my soul. I actually looked around the room I was studding in to see if I could see anything around me.

What happened next, I had a vision if I can call it that… I am not sure what it was?

All of a sudden I was sitting up in the corner of the room and I was looking down at myself studding at my desk. The girl studding/me, was not aware of anything around her/me. As I watched the surrounding, I noticed that there was a thick blackness covering the room. And in that blackness there were scary things… they seemed to be moving in on me. While I was watching this happen I knew that the girl at the desk, me, had no idea what was around her/me. I had this immediate fear swell up in me and I didn’t know what to do. I was scared. I wanted to warn this girl/me. The blackness was gathering closer.

But all of a sudden there appeared four large warrior looking guys that stood in a half circle around me at my desk. They had their backs to me and were facing all the darkness. Their arms were crossed. These warriors were muscular and had what seemed to be an armored skirt on… right to their knees, and armor slightly over their chests. (My first thought was Neiphite warriors.) They didn’t look alarmed/or concerned, but seemed to have a peaceful, confidence stare into the blackness. There was light, bright light coming off of them and the girl/me. And the girl at the desk/me still had no idea of the darkness around her/me and went on studding.

I saw this and had an immediate peace fall over me. The vision/whatever it was closed and I was back in my own body, looking down at my scriptures at my desk. I ran to go tell Sister Garbett and then knelt down and poured out thanks unto the Lord for showing me that vision/scene.

I don’t even know if I make sense… but it was amazing! We do have so many things around us that want to break us down and the devil is working hard at getting us to fall or give into temptation. BUT if we are doing those things those things that God would have us always do, reading the scriptures, praying, going to church, paying tithing, attending the temple often, fasting, often, ect… WE NEED NOT FEAR!!! God will protect us, and make if so we aren’t even aware of the ever glooming powers at Satan!!! (I do not share this story to say look at me, for that is not how it is… I shared this story that we all may remember the forces of good that surround us if we do the things the Lord asks. He will never forsake us, even when we do him at times.)
---
As I have spoken with some friends recently and have thought about the times we live in and trying to raise kids in such a corrupting world, I often reflect back on this experience and take great peace in knowing-- yes, we are surrounded by evil. Unkindness, selfishness, lust, appetites and unrighteous passions...It is all around us, but we need not fear.

As I drove around in the breath-taking rain storm today, I had this car in front of me. I grabbed my camera while chuckling.

This is a true statement! (Ha, I added the amen onto the bottom of the tire!) Life is good! And in the strength of the Lord we can do all things (Alma 20:4)! We can “BE believing” We need no/and can not afford room for doubt. We can gain and build our faith in Christ through repentance and through prayer!

This is a clip from on of my most favorite movies... Facing the Giants. (Yes a little cheesy at parts, but the message is amazing!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-vB59PkB0eQ

In the strength of the Lord! We don't give up. We keep going. We pray to Heavenly Father to help us. When our burdens become too heavy..."E'en though it be a cross that raiseth me...nearer my God to thee". Our crosses in this world raise us, closer to Him.

There is so much to be living for--for there was so much for Him to die/atone for!

Life IS good!

BLESSINGS OF THE TEMPLE

This is a beautiful.

IT WAS IMPORTANT TO ME--AND I AM IMPORTANT TO HIM!

I don’t have these stories written down yet, and they are so good (at least I think they are good) that they need to be written down. They start off my last few weeks! Waring, this is a long blog... read perhaps when you are board! ha ha.

BROTHER ANDERSON AND THE RING

A few months before going on the mission I had mission prep class with brother Anderson. He had to teach us in the chapel because nearly 250 of us would show up every Wed night to hear his class. One particular night he shared a story about a ring. Since that time I have tried to find him to write down a full detailed version of the story... but I have no idea where he is now. I even sent the Orem institute letters asking them to find him for me. So please if anyone know who this Brother Anderson is-- He is the uncle of Jessie Clark Funk (the LDS amazing singer) please let me know!!! I have been trying to thank him for this story he shared nearly 6 years ago!

Here is what I remember from this amazing story. Again, I hope someday to swap out this blog with his own words...

Brother Anderson in his younger years went on a vacation with some friends to CA I believe. Towards the end of their trip they went one day and played all day on the beach. At the end of the day they went up and boarded the busses. There was a cry from the back of the bus. One of the girls had lost (I think it was a ruby ring) that had been a family heirloom handed down from generation to generation. I don’t know long it had been handed down, but it was a very special position. Everyone jumped off the bus to see if they could find it on the beach. Brother Anderson said there were miles and miles of beach and they had been playing there for hours.

He and his buddy went searching together. Brother Anderson wondered how in the world they could find a ring in miles of beach. His buddy walked over to where the trees were and knelt down. Brother Anderson followed his lead and went over and knelt down too. His friend offered a prayer thanking Heavenly Father for the day they had had. He then said something to the effect of, “Heavenly Father, so and so has lost her ring. We know that this ring is just a piece of metal... no heavenly value, but we know that this daughter so and so is thy daughter. And we know thou loves her. And she is important to thee. And this ring is important to her. Please help us find the ring. He ended the prayer in the name of Jesus Christ. As soon as he said amen, Brother Anderson’s friend was on his feet walking over to the sand. His friend bent down and picked something up and yelled, “We have the ring! Let’s go!” His friend then headed up to the Bus. Brother anderson went on the bus and sat by his friend. He said the conversation went something like this..

Bro A: What just happened back there?
Friend: What do you mean?
Bro A: You just found a ring in the sand!
Friend: It’s no big deal, that happens all the time.

By the end of the story Brother anderson emphasized the power of prayer and faith. His friend had faith enough to ask, and then acted on what he was given.

This story moved me and six years later it has been a huge principle builder/reminder for me.

CTR RING IN THE MTC

Several months later I found myself in the MTC. We all had our districts and had elders over all of us. The girls had what was called a “coordinating sister”. This was a sister in the district who was to over see all the sisters in her district. The day our branch president pulled me aside and asked me to be this sister, I had to go to the bathroom and cry. Why would the Lord ask me to do that? (I look back and think how silly I was to cry over such a small simple calling, but thank goodness the Lord did not treat my very real inadequate feelings as something silly.)

One day one of my girls came frantically into our room. She was opening drawers and shaking out blankets. I asked her, what was up? She told me she had lost her CTR ring. It was the type that had the little middle spiny piece. I asked her if it was really special or if someone she loved gave it to her. She said that she had purchased it for herself not long ago or now, come to think of it, she might have said she had found it somewhere... I can’t remember.

All of us sisters got up and started searching the bathrooms/dorm rooms for this missing CTR ring. The spirit quickly, but gently reminded me of the story brother Anderson had shared with with the Mission prep class. I pondered over whether I could give such a prayer. After all the ring was not significant... There was not sentimental value that I could see. Would the Lord really listen and answer a prayer over a piece of metal? I felt the words, “Why not?”!!

I found a janitor’s closet and snuck inside. I knelt down and tried to offer up the prayer told to me by Brother Anderson. I thanked Heavenly Father for letting me be in the MTC and having the amazing experiences I was having. I commented to the Lord that I knew that this Sister Wiggington was his daughter and I knew he loved her. I prayed about how the ring was important to her, and because it was important to her, it would be important to him. I asked for help in finding the ring. I ended my prayer in the name of Jesus Christ amen.

When I said Amen, to my mind came the thought that her ring was in her closet on the floor. I got up from my knees and cautiously made my way to her closet. The other Sisters were still combing the bathrooms. I paused outside of her closet door. (The MTC closets are just a small cabinet that could hold a handful of hangers. I would say 3 feet wide by 3 -3 1/2 deep and maybe 6 - 6 1/2 feet tall.) I paused before opening the door. My heart was racing. So much stemmed on what I would find. If I didn’t find the ring, I was making up promptings in my head and I didn’t know how to receive answers to my prayers. If I did find it, I knew that my level of faith and testimony would be bumped up a huge notch because I had received revelation, and would have the confirmation to my heart and mind that it was in fact revelation, not just my thoughts! I finally opened up the door. Her clothes were neatly lined in a row. I looked at the floor of her closet. She had her dirty clothes bag laying there. I moved the clothes bag, only to reveal an empty closet floor.

At this point my heart sank. I felt foolish and I was secretly glad I had not told anyone of the prompting I had received. This meant that it was only me and the Lord who knew of what I thought to be, “my silliness”.

The next morning Sister Wiggington walked into the room and for whatever reason I noticed a ring on her hand. I asked her if she had gone and purchased another CTR ring. She just smiled and said, “Nope, I found mine!” I asked her where she had found it. She said that she had gone to do her laundry and when she had taken all of her clothes out of her bag, she found her ring at the bottom of her laundry bag. I asked if that was the same laundry bag that had been on her closet floor. She confirmed it was. With this I could not keep my smile from spilling onto my face! I had felt impressed that the ring was on the closet floor... and it was! There was just a piece of laundry bag fabric laying between the ring and the closet floor. I was so excited to tell my companion Sister Sulivan about the miracle. The Lord inspired her to be excited when I told her my experience because it was through her excitement I received yet another confirmation that this was in fact from the Lord and not something made up in my head!!!

These two stories inspired a lot of prayers on my mission and since that time! I can not count the many times I have prayed over what some people would think was something silly--but the faith was there, the question was asked, and the Lord provided! I love the topic prayer in the bible dictionary... “The object of prayer is not to change the will of God, but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant, but that are made conditional on our asking for them.” Heavenly father had the blessing of telling me where to find that ring... and had I not asked, I would have never known! SO WHY NOT ASK!?!! It can’t hurt! And in the end we may find that the Lord already had a blessing for that asking, in store for us!

So why do I bring up any of this?! I need to write down the miracles of my last week! They all stem off the “principle of the ring” or in other words, “ASKING”.

CARDIGAN & JACKET

This past week in Philly was a little different. Patti had me speaking the 2nd day. So that meant I was presenting on Friday night and Sat. Well on a corporate side of things that means I have to be business attire/jacket. I HATE wearing business jackets! And the problem was the one I feel most comfortable in is a brown one with flowers on it. The same jacket I wore on my business tripe to Baltimore this time last year. Many of the same people would be coming to this PHilly meeting. This is my vain side coming out, but because my brown jacket is so unique I did not feel like I could be in pictures yet again, wearing the same thing from last year. If it was a black jacket, no big deal. People would never know, but I was worried about wearing the brown jacket.

So with my worry, I took it to the Lord. He knows how much I hate to shop! He knows I don’t have a lot of money to spend. And he knows It is just hard to find jackets in my size. For almost a month I fretted/prayed over my situation finding a jacket/what to wear to the Philly meeting.

I left on Friday, but on Wed morning I had the impression that I needed to run to Lane Bryant. (Again, I know better then to ignore an impression.) So I left work and ran to Lane Bryant. As I walked in I found a cardigan... picture below that i thought would work.



I wasn’t thrilled with the price but I was grateful the Lord had provided something new for me. As I walked to the back of the store I decided to look through the clearance racks. Anyone who knows Lane Bryant--knows that it is a hit and miss. And for the most of the year, I have had quite the “miss” in finding anything good there. But there it was. A black jacket, my size, the only one, and long enough. (I say long enough because the style has been to have short-only to the waist line jackets. And honestly, what girl with lots of curves wants to be wearing anything short! Or anything revealing!?!) But here was a jacket in my size. I almost started crying. The price was $80 but since it was in the clearance section I figured that I would maybe spend $25- $30 for it.

I walked up to cashier and she rang up the jacket and said, “$6.99”. YES YOU READ THAT RIGHT!! I looked at her.. yes my eyes were wet and said, “you need to know you just witnessed a miracle from God! He just answered my prayers!!” She looked at me like I was nuts, but I didn’t care!

I had a problem and took it to the Lord. Was the jacket part of my eternal salvation. No way! But I am important to the Lord and being comfortable while speaking was important to me... It was amazing! I am far from being a model but take a look at heavenly father’s answers to prayer!!! And I was completely comfortable while speaking. And because I was comfortable my confidence was high.



SWOLLEN KNEE

Two weeks ago I was in GA and for whatever reason on the plane, I really messed up my knee. My knee had pressure on it from the chair in front of me. When I got back, I felt that my knee was had a lot of liquid on it. Bending it in any shape or form was pretty unbearable.

So when I flew to Philly for the HM meetings I said a prayer and asked that if there were open seats on the plane I would love to have them around Patti and I, or even better that I could get in the emergency row so I could keep my knee/leg stretched out. The plane started to taxi the run way. All the seats on mine and Patti’s rows were filled.

I felt the pressure in my knee starting to build from the seat in front of me touching my knee. A flight attendant came right over to me and said, “there are a few open rows. If you would like to take a seat in one of the rows, you will need to go right now.” (She spoke to me, no one else. I took 10 secs to think about it, when I decided to jump right up and go to the row. One man over hearing what she said to me, got up out of his seat too. As I walked down the row... wouldn’t you know it. There were two empty spots in the emergency exit row!! I was able to stretch out my knee the whole flight! Amazing! God is so good!

SPEAK FROM YOUR HEART

I was giving the opening talk “Key Note” for Saturday. This was something really different for me. This was a talk given by my Dad in Utah and in GA the CEO came to the meeting--and he gave this talk. Normally Patti always covers my Dad’s presentations... so when she asked me to speak, I was a little floored in her asking me.

I had wanted to prepare but lack of time, and really just no inspiration had come when I thought over the talk. Friday night I was determined to wake up an hour earlier the next day and that is when I would go over my talk. After some things that needed my attention I hit the pillow at nearly 2 AM. I figured I could pop out of bed at 4-4:30 and that would give me time to put my thoughts together. The next thing I know is that at 6:45 AM and Patti is waking me up! I didn’t hear my alarm and I had 45 mins to be downstairs in the hotel. (In humid conditions, and doing straight hair, the task of being ready is almost impossible to do in 45 mins!) As I frantically jumped in the shower and started getting ready, I pondered over the mess I was in. Here I had to give this opening presentation. A presentation that would set the mood for the whole day’s event. IF I bombed it, no more opportunities to speak at the start of something. What was I going to say?! I had nothing. As I started to panic, the quite impression came, “Speak from your heart.” I had a conversation with the spirit inside.

Me: Speaking from my heart is good, but this is an important moment for me. A lot hinges off of how I do.
Again--
impression: Speak from your heart
Me: Okay, but what is in my heart?! I don’t even know.

With that I stopped arguing and just did some seriously blind trusting. Through our rushed breakfast I tried to analyze what was inside my heart to get a clue over what I was going to say, BUT there was nothing. The impression to speak from my heart stayed with me.

Well I did just that. I got up to do this Key-note little talk and the Lord filled my mouth, for it surely didn’t come from me! And what came into my heart I spoke through my mouth. It was amazing!!! At the end of the meeting as Patti and I were driving to Baltimore to meet Laynie and Annie... I confessed to Patti that I had no clue what I was going to say, but that I was told to just speak from my heart. Patti gave a little chuckle while a huge grin came across her face. She said as she was typing up the agenda she went to type her name in the spot for the talk because she always covered my dad’s material. But she felt impressed, “Bryndi should give this talk because she can speak from her heart.” !!!! To anyone reading this, no big deal, but I will tell you what, to ME--THIS IS A HUGE BIG DEAL!! The Lord used the same words in both of our promptings only confirming to me even more his matchless wisdom and endless kindness. Patti and I both spent some time rejoicing in the car! I think I smiled for a sold 5 mins!!

BIG KNEE

As the meeting in Philly ended I noticed that my knee not only was quite swollen but any bending movement made me want to cry. My knee has never been so bad. As we cleaned up I saw some poles on the floor. The thought of having to bend my knee to pick them up was almost more then I could bare. I called sweet justin over to help pick up the pulls. He didn’t say anything but I am sure he thought, “Oh Bryn, you old woman!”

When I went to get in the rental car, I found that I could sit just fine, but I did not have the power to pull my leg into the car. My knee was too swollen and it would not do anything I commanded it to do with my brain. I had to actually pick up my leg with my two hands and place it in the car. So EMBARRASSING!

Would you believe it, I woke up with almost no pain to my knee Sunday morning?! It was still swollen, but I could bend it must more freely then the previous week!?! The whole day was spent in flats and for the most part I was sitting. Normally on sundays, I am up and going by 10 am in high heals and I don’t get home until after 10 PM. This whole day was spent in flats, and no running around. TENDER MERCY indeed. Even thought I missed my girls and the ward--God had wisdom in letting me rest in MD!

BETTRIDGES

Laynie and Annie were worried about there being ice on the road since their church was 20 mins away. I ran to the bathroom and with some effort kneeled down. I was confident the Lord would give us a way to get to church so I could partake of the sacrament. And he did!

As I walked into the sacrament room, I saw a couple smiling up at me. Bishop and Sister Bettridge! A wonderful couple from my mission I had not seen them in almost 4 years! As we sat down I started to weep with the thoughts of how kind the Lord has been to me this whole trip! Jacket, cardigan, emergency exit row, talk from heart, fixed knee, getting to church, wonderful mission friends, and just being with Laynie and Annie!! Seriously! Had I had a spoiling or what!!!?!

NO D.C.

When I had originally planned with Laynie and Annie to come out, we had talked about going and touring DC a little. Sunday night came and the snow started. By Monday morning there were a good 3 to 4 inches out and still falling. Schools were canceled. Laynie and Annie were pretty fixed to not go to D.C.. I pondered over this. I thought, no way were we not going to go. After all I hadn’t even toured D.C. and they had taken work/school off and I had extended my trip to Philly for this. Of course we were going to go. But as the morning moved on it was evident that we were not going to go. (The Lord is full of wonderful surprises. And if we will allow him, he will show us parts and pieces of his amazing workings in our lives!)

I went again to the bathroom to pray. I prayed that there would be a way for us to see some things in D.C.. But as I prayed (and I was not pleading, merely just talking) I had the thought, “Bryndi, you are praying to go, but you don’t understand, others may be praying to not go and for the snow to come.” This thought was crazy to my mind. Why would Annie and Laynie pray to not go to D.C.?! Again, after all, I had kind of built my trip around that idea.

But with this new found thought, I let my mind set on the fact we would not be going to D.C..

God’s wisdom IS wisdom!

Instead of going to D.C. I was able to hear Laynie play the piano, and witness the first duet of “I feel my Savior’s Love” and “Chop sticks” by Laynie and Annie. We then went and picked up Katie, Annie’s sister. We did a little shopping at the mall, then a little guitar hero (which I had never really fully seen/understood before) and then it was off to the melting pot, which I also had never done before. The day was full with the four of us. And Katie made it all the more fun and exciting!!! I loved getting to know her. I felt right way like God wanted me to see her the way he does. It seemed the whole night I was given an inside scoop to how incredible this girl was. By the end of the night I felt like the four of us had been hanging out together, for years!

Again the thought of D.C. scrapped my brain and I thought maybe I could pray to at least see the temple and do a session with Laynie and Annie the next morning but that was not the plan. We went and sat in one of Laynie’s classes. She is such an amazing teacher!

On the drive to the airport Annie then revealed a missing puzzle piece! She said that she and Laynie were so happy to not go to D.C. I was shocked at this and asked “why”? For her words matched the impression I was given but I couldn’t understand why they would not want to go. Annie said that while Laynie’s parents had been out (just two weeks prior) and they went walking all over D.C. with them. It had been very tiring and stressful. BINGO- the puzzle no longer seemed like a puzzle. They had just been there and did not want to do it again--therefore had been praying in a sense to get out of going again. It all made sense!! And my eyes were opened up to God’s wisdom. And not just for Laynie and Annie’s sanity, but also for the blessing of getting to be with Katie. Had we gone to D.C I would have probably never really gotten to really know Katie... and her friendship is way greater then some museum in D.C! Plus the ride to the airport opened up Annie’s soul to me even more-- and what I found there was even deeper then I realized. I thought she was pretty deep before. Annie has an ever burning desire to be good. She has an innate ability to serve and give of her self.

This whole trip was amazing!!!!!!!!!! And I saw the hand of the Lord it seemed like every hour.

THE ICING ON THE CAKE!

As I boarded the plane and waited to get started, I looked through the movie guide. There were only 2 PG movies listed and the rest for a lot of PG 13’s. I offered a little prayer. Normally I always pray for missionary opportunities for the person sitting next to me on the plane, but I asked, not because I didn’t want the opportunity, but that I was just exhausted from a month of lots of weekend meetings... I asked that no one would sit in the seat next to me, so I could be more comfortable on the flight home. I also asked if there was a way, I would love to have a PG movie come on so that I could watch it.

The plane stayed at the gate an extra 35 mins of just sitting, waiting for the doors to close. I think there were only 2 open seats on the whole plane... and one was next to me!! Then the movie came on, “The Express” - one of the only 2 PG movies listed. I could not help but smile and praise heavenly father for his kindness! Great movie, I was grateful to have something clean to entertain me and I cried at this true story based on this great guy who ended up having leukemia. He died really young. Thoughts of my Dad and his cancer filled my mind as I wiped the tears away...grateful to still have him on the earth.

God really hears our prayers! We can always pray! And why not?! There may be a blessing waiting but is conditional to be receive because it needs to be asked for!!! God is good! And I learned that there are reasons for everything! Even if I don’t feel like I understand God’s will, the fact is, he has a will/plan/way and I need to follow it!

BE THE MEANS

This morning as I was reading in 3 Nep Chapter 18, I was impressed by verse 32:

"Nevertheless, ye shall not cast him out of your synagogues, or your places of worship, for unto such shall ye continue to minister; for ye know not but what they will return and repent, and come unto me with full purpose of heart, and I shall heal them; and ye shall be the means of bringing salvation unto them. "


The Savior is talking to he 12 disciples he choose on this side of the world. In the previous verses he has taught the importance of prayer and that we all need to pray to our Father in the name of Jesus Christ.

He then talks about not letting anyone partake of the sacrement unworthily. Verse 32 follows right after this backdrop.

He tells us to not turn away people who have struggles/need help, but minister unto them for [we] "... know not but what they will return and repent, and come unto [the Savior] with full purpose of heart, and [he] shall heal them... (vs 32)". The Savior tells us that WE can be the means of bringing salvation unto those individuals. The definition of mean: an agency, instrument, or method used to attain an end. What a beautiful commandment! To be a means!

As you will soon come to find out, I am a freak when it comes to little thoughts from the scriptures. I have to come up with a sign to hang on my wall that reminds me of what I just learned. I normally just choose a nature shot, but today I found this picture of my uncle Paul. Anyone who knows my uncle Paul knows that he is one of the most giving/kind/service oriented man to walk our time. I happened to be over at his house late and he insisted that I not leave empty handed. The beautiful bucket of aprocots he is holding, was put in my car along with squash, tomatoes for my dad, and other wonders from his garden. I can not tell you how many different loads of food have filled that metal bucket. I can not tell you how many houses that bucket has traveled to! Paul never thinks twice to serve. When he is compelled to go a mile--he goes five! My food storage consists of bottled items coming from he and his loving wife Becky. The are, "Being the Means" to bless all those who come in contact with them. -- Oh how I want to be a means like they are!

I also love that the Savior tells us that those that do repent, and come with full purpose of heart--he SHALL heal them. How true is this for all of us. The Savior is the Master of all Healing!