FEAR

(I apologize to anyone who received an email from this post! I hit publish on accident. This is the "real" post! So sorry!)

I can't claim this  awesome picture of what sand looks like close up in Africa! Thanks to the guide and my parents camera! Awesome shot! As my mom says, "Sand Crystals"!

Tonight, Mr. Dashing and I read through Alma 57 in the Book of Mormon. ....profound NEW insight for me!

The Nephites are contending with the Lamanites. The captured Lamanites prisoners are so many that a small number of Nephite soldiers start to march the Lamanite prisoners to a different city so the city will be able to help maintain the prisioners. The prisoners break free. Gid was the chief captain over those who had been appointed to guard the prisoners on the march. In his word's he shared what had happened with the breakout of the prisoners....

Behold, we did start to go down to the land of Zarahemla with our prisoners. And it came to pass that we did meet the spies of our armies, who had been sent out to watch the camp of the Lamanites.

And they cried unto us, saying—Behold, the armies of the Lamanites are marching towards the city of Cumeni; and behold, they will fall upon them, yea, and will destroy our people.

And it came to pass that our prisoners did hear their cries, which caused them to take courage; and they did rise up in rebellion against us.

And it came to pass because of their rebellion we did cause that our swords should come upon them. And it came to pass that they did in a body run upon our swords, in the which, the greater number of them were slain; and the remainder of them broke through and fled from us.

And behold, when they had fled and we could not overtake them, we took our march with speed towards the city Cumeni; and behold, we did arrive in time that we might assist our brethren in preserving the city.

And behold, we are again delivered out of the hands of our enemies. And blessed is the name of our God; for behold, it is he that has delivered us; yea, that has done this great thing for us. (emphasis added)

 HOLY COW!!  Stay with me here.

The prisoners [in this case they were those from the Lamanite army] are the enemy. When they heard the Nephites [the spies] "cries" about what may happen to the people in Cumeni, they took courage and did rise up in rebellion.

To my mind came the comparison of when we have "cries" a.k.a "fears"...We are told over and over in the scriptures to "fear not" and be of good cheer. PERHAPS--when we show fear [fear of the future or to what is happening to a loved one, or whatever circumstance we find ourselves in or perceive may happen] Satan and all of his followers--when they hear/see our cries [our fear] they take courage and rise up against us--EVEN MORE then when they were just 'marching alongside' us!?!

Satan and his band are already trouble! I surely don't need them taking courage and rising up even more against me!!

Conversation with myself:

Q: Well that is just great! :/ I fear all the time, so now I am doomed even more?! My fear gives Satan more power?!
A: Well yes fear is "power" to Satan, but no you are not doomed. In the end of those verses see what Gid says: "And behold, we are again delivered out of the hands of our enemies. And blessed is the name of our God; for behold, it is he that has delivered us; yea, that has done this great thing for us."

God still can help us and does help us when our weakness of fear manifests, just as he helped the Nephites against the prisoner outbreak. And in this particular story their cries caused a chain reaction that in the end made it so Gid and his men could go back to the main army and help save them from being overpowered. [For another time--that is a look into how God can make strength out of our weakness and in no way am I approving of fear here, but it is another layer to the spiritual onion.]

We are to fear God which will help keep our natural man in check, but all other things we are not to fear, but be believing. Great lesson for me! Sweet insight to what Satan and his band do as a result of seeing my fears.

So why the awesome sand picture at the top?! Did you see "them"? Two snake eyes and part of his face hiding smack in the middle. Apparently it is a deadly snake but my parents guide was chill taking the picture for them.

We never know what is around the corner, but with putting our trust and faith in God and doubting nothing-- He will deliver us in His time and in His way. One constant theme in the Book of Mormon is deliverance. And sometimes that deliverance comes in the form of "strength" to simply endure.

Happiness is a way made to live in the same state as Mr. Dashing! Here I come WY--ready or not. :)

I am grateful for parents who are determined to conquer their new challenges. 

And p.s. I have no time to write this post and yet the insight was too profound not to take the time!

"ROOM TO CROSS AND CONTEND"

A few weeks back I was studying in Alma 2… and had some sweet thoughts. Amlici has gone against the voice of the people, and has dubbed himself King over the band that supports him. He decides to go to war against his brethren. Talk about the impact of having “contentions among ourselves”! Brethren fought against brethren.

In the middle of the battle (after loosing 12,000ish of his followers) Amlici hooks up with a Lamanite army which is described as “being as numerous almost, as it were, as the sands of the sea”. Those type of odds have got to be a little bit daunting!

The scriptures say that Alma, (the one that saw the angel/is now the high priest over the land) goes at the head of his army to contend with Amlici and his army. Alma, as a Leader, teaches by example some awesome principles that I can apply to my life.

 Alma and Amlici were going head to head and obviously had to take a “breather” from the battle because:

 29 And it came to pass that Alma fought with Amlici with the sword, face to face; and they did contend mightily, one with another.

 30 And it came to pass that Alma, being a man of God, being exercised with much faith, cried, saying: O Lord, have mercy and spare my life, that I may be an instrument in thy hands to save and preserve this people.

 31 Now when Alma had said these words he contended again with Amlici; and he was strengthened, insomuch that he slew Amlici with the sword.

It says he contended again with Amlici. And he obviously had some type of time to offer such an awesome, selfless prayer. And BEING EXERCISED WITH MUCH FAITH, he asked (no doubt according to the will of the Lord) a pretty powerful/selfless wish, and his words were granted.

I asked myself, am I being exercised with much faith that in a moments notice I can pray with that much power?!  (Yep I have room to defiantly improve upon! :) thank goodness God is a perfectly patient God!.).

But again, look at this awesome Leader Alma—what he did. He contended with Amlici, killed him. Started beating up the King of the Lamanites, but the king retreated and sent his guards…

 33 But Alma, with his guards, contended with the guards of the king of the Lamanites until he slew and drove them back.

 34 And thus he cleared the ground, or rather the bank, which was on the west of the river Sidon, throwing the bodies of the Lamanites who had been slain into the waters of Sidon, that thereby his people might have room to cross and contend with the Lamanites and the Amlicites on the west side of the river Sidon.

…COOL!!! WITH HIS guards (those closest, bound in convent, strength, trust worthy—whatever would deem you the possession of being a "guard" for your head Leader)… together they slew and drove back the enemy…. And the ground was cleared! Why? So the rest of the army (anyone I love or am working with) could go and contend with all the other bad dudes/content with their [challenges, whatever that challenge/enemy may be].

What is symbolic of a ground being cleared? Didn’t the Savior “clear the ground” for me so I could walk the path of repentance, to have a way to escape the very jaws of Hell!? Not taking away the trials, but He cleared the way so I could “have room” to walk on and fight the battles/tests placed before me?!?! In what ways am I “clear[ing] the ground” for those in my family, those whom I work with, those whom I serve? Am I teaching with the spirit in which sets up a “clear ground” where others will have “room to cross and contend” to make covenants and progress?! … Did I loose you on this?! :)

A.)  I want to be someone who is being exercised in much faith so at any given moment I am literally a tool for those I love with my prayers and my desires.

B.)  Am I working at qualifying to be on the front line = devoted/supporting whatever God allots to my path so that I can be a guard for/with Him, and for truth?!

C.)  What am I doing to clear the way (teaching, serving, preparing the ground) so that I am giving room/making room for someone else to be able to contend with/go to war/conquer the challenge “enemy” before them?!

GO ALMA!!! Go GUARDS!! Is this not what being a member of His church is all about?! Clearing the ground!

I am thankful for "cleared" ground.

Happiness is a new semester of Mission Prep.

LESSONS NOT LOST - VOL 3

So it has been a good few weeks! Lot's of lesson's not lost on me.

BETTY & JASICCA

From my journal

7.6.2011
It is almost 2:30 in the morning but I feel that I need to write.
BETTY: Sunday, as I was sitting in Rs pondering over what God would have me ponder over--I noticed two girls coming in the room.  I wondered who they were.  Well going into Sunday school I saw [someone] sitting by herself, so my thoughts were to sit by her, but as I (in very brief brief time) I prayed/wondered if God needed me to sit by anyone.  I then saw two girls sitting by themselves.  I spoke to them for a min.  Soon the Jasicca ( girl from samoa) turned to me and told me Betty, the other girl, was not a member of the church

Ha you can tell it was 2:30 in the morning with that entry! :)

I felt impressed that I needed to sit by the girls.  So leaving my natural thought of wanting to sit by someone who was sitting alone, I went over and plotted myself next to the girls.

Jasicca (far left) was sitting next to the wall in Sunday School and I sat down next to Betty (the robinhood gal next to me) and introduced myself.  After a few moments, Betty's attention went somewhere else and in less then a brief sentence, Jasicca shared that they were roommates and that this was Betty's first time at church and we needed to find the missionaries.

Well-- from there the beautiful journey of these two girls in my life came into play!  I invited them over to my house to have a chat about the gospel.  I couldn't get a hold of the ward missionaries, so I decided to just have a small visit.  Jasicca couldn't come over--but Betty could and she did!

I was pretty nervous and fears of what to say started to consume me.  I knelt down and asked for the Lord to loosen my tongue and to bring me peace.

Betty and I chatted for a long time.  Mind you this girl is amazing!  She had just met me at church but still came over to my house to chat--and alone!  That says something right there.

We talked for quite some time about everything.  Then before her leaving I asked her if she would like to say a prayer.  She had never really prayed out loud before and I told her it was no problem and that I knew she could do it.  With some help in knowing where to direct her sentences, she addressed God and then thanked him for letting her have the time to meet with me.  She then asked if God would help her come to know him and if he would make a way for her brother to receive/learn about God and the Book of Mormon.  She then ended her prayer in the name of Jesus Christ and we both said amen.  I was floored.  This girl hadn't committed to reading The Book of Mormon, BUT she asked God to help her brother read/learn about it.  Betty at this point wasn't even sure she believed in God--but that prayer she offered up in my place was powerful!  And little did she know it was just a matter of time.

TIME!  What a beautiful thing. Time to change, to work out our salvation. Time to forgive, work on weaknesses. Time to serve.  Well Jasicca, Betty's roommate, had been using her time to pray to God for Betty's sake!  For months Jasicca had been praying that some how Betty would let God enter into her life. Talk about Jasicca could totally be related to Ammon's dad in the Book of Mormon!  For her faith and love and pleading for Betty to have the gospel in her life--was a powerful means that God used to help change Betty's life.

Weeks followed and we had a few meetings with the full time missionaries. The missionaries had hard core accents and even with me being formilar with gospel terms, even I had hard times figuring out what they were saying, and that meant most of the lessons were over Betty's head.  But she met and every Sunday came to all of church with Jasicca.  Betty was changing her life, and didn't even catch on at first, but Jasicca and I sure saw it!

Betty wanted to see a baptism, so I invited her to come to Afton (my niece's) baptism.  That was awesome to have her there!

One Sunday I asked if we could set up another appointment with the missionaries and Betty turned that down.  So unusual to my norm, I left it at that and never brought it back up.

WELL come to find out that the Elder that had a very think accent got transferred and the new elder and his companion were at McDonalds when Betty came in and they struck up a conversation.  The new missionary was part of GOD's timing with Betty.

Unannounced to me, Betty started meeting with the missionaries again.  One Friday came over to my place to watch 17 Miracles (I highly recommend the great movie) with Jassica and me.  Betty told me she had some exciting news.  She came over and told me she had prayed that evening after the missionaries left and felt it was right to get baptized!  Here is a girl that did a 180!  She went from never praying before/not believing in God, to praying and trusting enough in him ask questions.  I stand all amazed!

So--November 5th brought Betty's day making/showing God that she was/IS willing to keep his commandments and remember and have faith in Jesus Christ--she showed this to God by being baptized! 

It truly was an amazing day!

Mauricio, Betty's brother--whom she prayed for the very first day she came to my house-- came to her baptism.

I went and hugged him after the baptism and I asked him what he thought. He told me that he leaned over to his mom and said that he should have been baptized with Betty.  I gave his arm a slight nudge and told him that now he can have a program all to himself! Betty's family made a HUGE feast for everyone in celebrating their daughter. Her mom cooked in the kitchen with Mauricio's help for two days to prepare the food.  Talk about a spoiling!

The next morning what a beautiful thing it was to see Betty's family sitting in church. They had never attended a sacrament meeting for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints before. Betty's mom speaks a little English.  The Sunday was Fast Sunday.  I prayed that her family would feel the spirit even with the language barriers.  How choice it was then - when God inspired a kid in the ward to bare his testimony--and at the very end of his testimony, he started talking in Spanish!! For the time that I have been in this ward, I have NEVER heard someone bare their testimony in something other than English. And the kid could have never known that Betty's family was there, and that they were not members, that this was their first time, nor could he have known that one of them doesn't understand English 100%!! I seriously wanted to cry.  God is GREAT!

So Betty is now a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints! Here is a shot from the day at my Niece's Baptism--and then Betty's big day.

Jasicca's smile in the bottom half says it all!  I love both of these girls!!  And what great examples they are for me!  GOD has perfect timing!  And He will patiently wait for us to come to Him.

A few days after Betty's Baptism and receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost I asked her how she was doing.  To which she replied, "GREAT!"  I asked her why that was, to which she responded that she was great and happy because she was a member.

So what does this mean for Betty?  will she ever have hard times, struggles, times where she feels the sun may not be shining.  OH YES!  We already talked about life's fierce storms beat on both the foolish man and the wise man house.  Equal storms.  The difference is the foundation=power those men have to draw for strength while in the midst of a storm.  Betty has built her foundation on Christ.  She has built her foundation on a ROCK!

My heart is still swollen when thinking of Jasicca's desires for her friend to find happiness.  We can not force others to change.  And surely God won't make/force anyone to change.  But through our love and faith, prayers and hope--God can work the miracles needed to help bring one's heart to a condition to recognize truth/seek truth and then act on the revelation/truths they have found.

Two amazing woman!

LESSONS NOT LOST
I have been pondering and take great value in some truths that have been taught to me the last few weeks.

HOW HE USED HIS TIME

I picked Thaynermack up on his birthday and we rushed off to the mall where he was going to go to a movie with mom and dad. I sang him happy birthday in the car and then asked him how his day had gone.  He told me that he got up and spent some time alone with God.  He said that he awoke and was just so grateful to God for letting him have another birthday here on the earth.  He was so happy to be alive and just spent the morning with his thoughts on God in gratitude.  This coming from the kid that has died several times and has lived a good two years of his life in total in and out of the hospitals.  And here it was his birthday--and he was choosing to live it praising God for still allowing him to be on the earth.  My cheeks became wet.  What a great example Thayne is to me. And I, and my whole family, are so glad/grateful that Thayne is a member of our family!  We need his testimony, his love, and his example of cheerfully submitting to whatever God has in store.  I love you Thaynermack!


BEING CASUAL
In preparing for Stake Conference, I went to a Stake Temple night.  A brother in the Temple Presidency shared a profound statement.  He said that for members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints... one of the worst things one can do is become casual to God.  Be casual with keeping covenants, commitments and commandments.  WELL ISN'T THAT THE TRUTH!  Satan doesn't need me to kill, cheat, swear, lie, etc--BUT if he can just get me to be casual in my prayers, my church attendance/duties, my scripture study--casual is just another word for complacent and/or numb. BEWARE!


HOW IS MY VIEW?
Bishop Lifferth, in an email shared with me a conversation he heard on the radio that he felt, and I would agree, was profound.  The statement was: "People have a tendency to judge people on their actions but we judge ourselves on our intentions.  If we do judge someone let's make sure we judge them on their intentions."  He sent this statement at a perfect time because I was still pondering over something Danny had shared at his Dad's funeral the  Saturday before.

Danny made the observation/posed the question why is it that when someone dies, everyone seems to focus on all that person's strengths and what was good about them.  What they "did" rather than what they "didn't do" in life.  He shared that when someone is living right before us we tend to be critical and sometimes only view/focus on their weaknesses and the things they "don't do" or the things they "aren't".  Danny brought up this observation of how death seems to melt away negative feelings and helps one view one's life completely positive. Revering and truly honoring that person for what they "did" do for who they "really"were.  He shared this observation and then said how great it would be to live life and treat everyone as if they had just died... to see and focus on their strengths and what they are doing good.

I remember being in the hospital with Dad during the long nights with cancer.  And although the times were often bleak and we had no idea which direction things were going to go--as a family, we often commented on how little things didn't matter anymore.  The stuff that seemed so huge and pressing, had become grains of sand blowing in the wind, compared to the time we were taking "being" a family.  Cancer brought us back to basics.  To what was REALLY important and what REALLY mattered.

So if I judge someone on their intentions--basically meaning have more patience with them and truly seeing them as the being they are, as a child of God (without having to bring death into the picture) -- what a way to live life!!  How is my view of someone/situations now?


DON'T MESS UP YOUR SACRED PLACES
At our Stake Conference, our Stake President, President Owens, challenged us to not desecrate those areas that have become our sacred places.  The places/areas/locations where we have felt of the spirit and have had moments with God.  Satan would like nothing more than to destroy those little areas.  So for a room, instead of being a safe haven with scripture study and prayer, if immoral acts are preformed/viewed in a place that was once sacred to us, those areas will be desecrated.  He then challenged us to each build up our own "Waters of Mormon" areas.  If Satan, is allowed because of our opening the door, destroys the moments in life that were sacred to us--he will rob us of places where we might have gained peace.


POWER IN KEEPING COVENANTS
Jen and I were talking the other day about going to the temple.  Jen then shared a very profound statement with me that has rung so true.

When she was first striving to go to the temple once a week--mind you this is quite a task for a mom of six--she said that the morning she would plan to go EVERYTHING would go wrong. Melt downs with the kids, literally all would break loose!  After hours of struggling Jen said that she almost said out loud, "FINE!  If this is what happens with going to the temple I am not going!  It is not worth it!"  Beautifully, however, Jen caught the "trap"! She realized that Satan didn't want her at the temple, and by her giving into not going was his very plan...he wanted to keep her out of the temple.  Once she realized what was really going on, she decided that that was it!  That NO MATTER WHAT, no matter what powers broke out, that REGARDLESS--she would be going to the temple.  NO matter what!

Jen said the most amazing thing happened.  When she finally committed with a covenant to attend the temple and was 100% set on keeping that covenant (no wavering), Satan's tactics couldn't frustrate her into NOT going.  And even if and when the world fell apart, she would still go.  She said some mornings did still fall apart, but the difference was in how she handled the opposition.  She didn't become angry or upset for she was still going no matter what, so it was just a matter of getting through/over the obstacle so she could be in the temple that day.  And with that commitment, she said her burdens were literally lightened!  Whatever went wrong, went wrong.  But she didn't let it affect her mind set of going to the temple or not. We then made connections to other covenants we make in and outside of the temple. 

SO once I make and keep with a full soul a particular covenant, like we learn in the temple, Satan really can have no power over us.  Keeping covenants WITHOUT wavering provides one with innumerable power!  Great truth!

NEW TACTICS BROUGHT TO LIGHT
Another PROFOUND thought was shared with me by a friend who was seeking a blessing.  She is not one to ask for blessings a lot.  In the past when she has felt to get a blessing, the day comes up and her life eases up just enough that her situation doesn't seem as dire as it had felt when she thought to get a blessing.  So, because life was not AS dire, she didn't get the blessing because after all she was "doing better".

This week that friend made an amazing inspired observation.  She felt to get a blessing, but had to wait until the next day to get it.  The day she felt to get a blessing, her life was a mess and her burdens almost too heavy to bare.  The next day, things didn't seem to be "as bad".  She was coping with things a little better and found that she really didn't need to get a blessing... BUT her mind was led to behold a tactic of Satan she had never thought caught on before. Why is it when ever she commits to getting a blessing, that the day the blessing is going to be given--her burdens seem more under control and less heavy.  In the past she just hasn't gone through with getting a blessing.  HOWEVER!!  Does Satan want her getting a blessing?  NO!  And why is that?  She will be given power/comfort/revelation even or other items to bless her life and the situation she is in.  SO wouldn't it make sense that Satan, when seeing we are going to get a blessing tells his devils, "Lay off a bit today.  We need that individual to be "okay" long enough in life to help them think they no longer need/want a blessing." HELLO!!! Doesn't this tactic make sense!  Truly brilliant!

My friend said that when this idea was brought to her mind, she figured she was even MORE in need of that blessing for Satan to let up a little so she wouldn't follow through with getting the blessing.  And sure enough, when she received the blessing--the things said she needed to hear and have in her life.  WOW!  Never caught this angle of Satan before.  It makes perfect sense!  I have even stopped the process of getting a blessing because at the moment, I was "fine" so therefor it would be silly to still get one.  Oh Satan is GOOD (in the sense that he is soo good at what he does)!!  BUT!!!!!!!!!  God is SOOO much greater!

----

I told you--I have had some amazing few last weeks.  :)

Lessons NOT LOST ON ME!

...BE GLAD!

Last night in institute our studies brought us to section 29. I have studied section 29 before, but as we read verses 31 and particularly 32 my mind opened up to what is probably an obvious insight, but the symbolism was new for me.

Doctrine and Covenants 29:31-32 reads:

For by the power of my Spirit created I them; yea, all things both spiritual and temporal—

First spiritual, secondly temporal, which is the beginning of my work; and again, first temporal, and secondly spiritual, which is the last of my work—

So the order in that second verse is:

Phase 1
1st - SPIRITUAL
2nd - TEMPORAL

then the order changes

Phase 2
1st - TEMPORAL
2nd - SPIRITUAL

With phase 1, we were all created 1st spiritual before ever coming to earth. God prepared a way to have an earth life for us = 2nd temporal. Phase 2 -- born into this earth life we full fill
the "1st" and become "temporal" with our new bodies. And because of the veil placed over our minds we now, on/in this earth life, need to full fill the 2nd and become once again Spiritual! A complete Beautiful circle [square picture-but I think you get the idea]!


So again...this earth life is about becoming Spiritual beings yet again. For we were once! And we have all finished steps 1 and 2 of phase 1 for we all were created spiritually and given a plan for mortality. And we have all finished the 1st step of phase 2 by becoming temporal--for surely our being born in into this life with bodies that age and fall apart, we have accomplished becoming temporal first. NOW for the 2nd step of this journey--becoming spiritual once again, THUS preparing us to be able to live in the Kingdom of Heaven.

I know there are a lot more applications with those verses, but I thought it was a beautiful reminder of what I am to be doing. Christ says:

Lift up your hearts and be glad, for I am in your midst, and am your advocate with the Father; and it is his good will to give you the kingdom.

This life is NOW about becoming spiritual yet again. The Lord's council to David Whitmer is a good reminder to me! Doctrine and Covenants Section 30:

Behold, I say unto you, David, that you have feared man and have not relied on me for strength as you ought.

But your mind has been on the things of the earth more than on the things of me, your Maker…

I often fear man and forget that I am to RELY on Jesus Christ for strength. And too often I fall into the temporal trap of focusing on things that are temporal= having my mind be on "the things of the earth more than the things of [my] Maker"!

Well it's a new day!! And I am all about making my brown arrow--become and achieving white -- the 2nd step of phase 2. To become spiritual once again!!

Jesus is the Christ! He lives! -- And I know it!

"...HER SPIRIT CAME AGAIN"

(Sorry this published/posted without being finished. Hit the wrong key! This is the "real" post. Sorry!)

As I was saying my prayers, over and over I felt the need to blog a great treasure I found in the scriptures this evening when I was studying.

I was reading through the different accounts of Jairus's daughter. There are so many things to take from this reading of this faithful ruler of a synagogue. His 12 year old, only daughter, was dieing. He sought out the Savior, fell at his feet and asked the Savior to come to his home and "lay thy hands on [his daughter], that she may be healed; and she shall live." Mark 5:23.

Love the faith of this father! And what an example for any of us with a loved one that is dying spiritually--that we seek out the Savior in our own lives and when He is present (because we go to where he is) we can fall and plead that he go to the aid of the one we love. This principle of first coming to the Savior was described masterfully by Elder Holland. I know I have shared it before, but I don't think it can be shared enough. He said:

He [Jesus Christ] is saying to us, “Trust me, learn of me, do what I do. Then, when you walk where I am going,” He says, “we can talk about where you are going, and the problems you face and the troubles you have. If you will follow me, I will lead you out of darkness,” He promises. “I will give you answers to your prayers. I will give you rest to your souls.” (emphasis added)

Jesus arose and followed Jairus! (Jairus first "came" to Christ, and then they could travel together... so profound.)

But as they went the crowd crowded Jesus. And any quickened steps they were taking, were slowed down. I wonder if Jairus was tempted to be irritated or worried because his daughter was already dieing. I thought of those great times one asks for a blessing, and sometimes the person in need of the blessing has to wait for the hands to come. This was an interesting thought for me. I am one that when a blessing is needed by anyone, I like to "jump" on the action asap, but this good Father that had to "wait"/not get somewhere as soon as he may have liked, had to wait. The Priesthood holder, Jesus Christ, was on his way, but was detained. But detained or not, the "priesthood power" was still on it's way. What an insight into waiting on the need of someone else, especially when it is crisis mode... and that it can still be okay!

The beauitful miracle of the woman with the issue of blood--touching the hem of the Savior is played out while the Savior is being crowded by folks. This story alone is beauitful with deep insights but will have to wait for another time.

When the miracle with the woman with blood is complete, a messenger comes to Jairus and tells him that his daughter is already dead. Basically, "Don't bother about bringing Jesus, there is no reason to now". (Obviously that is my Bryndi lingo.) The scriptures in Mark, & Luke say that Jesus heard this comment. And as soon as he heard the comment he told Jairus to "Be not afraid, only believe"(Mark 5:36) "...and she shall be made whole."(Luke 8:50)

The scripture in Mark says, "As soon as Jesus heard the word that was spoken" about the girl dieing, he told Jairus to not fear. But was there a long enough break in the comment from the messenger to the time the Savior states for Jairus to not fear, for Jairus's mind to sink into disappointment/heartache and possible temptation to think, "had we just hurried around the crowed we might have gotten there...!" who knows?! But interesting thought what test just hearing the news brought to Jairus's faith.

They get to Jairus's home and find people are "making noise" (Matt). Christ tells them to stop morning "for the maid is not dead, but sleepeth." The people just laughted at the Savior because they "knew" she was dead. To them the words from the Savior must have been obserd/foolishness.

The Savior "put"'s [kicks] the scorners out. Then with the faith of the parents, Peter, James, and John, he takes the maiden by the hand and tells her to arise and she arises.

BEAUTIFUL story no!!!?! :)

...but here comes an even more beautiful insight for me!!

Once the daughter was commanded to arise... "...her spirit came again, and she arose straightway: and he [Christ] commanded to give her meat." (Luke 8:55). In Mark the Savior commanded "...that something should be given her to eat." This is deep.

The Father seeks out the Savior, arrives where he is, and seeks the help for a loved one. The Savior goes to the rescue. The daughter dies before the Savior gets there. The Savior comes into her home, takes her hand and "her spirit [comes back] again." Then the Savior commands for her to be given something to eat, and not just "anything" to eat, but particularly that she should have meat.

SYMBOLICALLY--we first, as Enos did when he worked on getting himself alined with God, then, when he was "good" with God, he had the desire for the welfare of his bretheren and sought out blessings for them in prayer. He first went to the Savior--then once there, could discuss the needs of others. Perhaps someone we love is dieing spiritually. Is falling off the path, refuses to hold the iron rod, and/or is "feeling" their way to the great and spacious building. We seek the Savior, by first making sure He is in our own life (this is done by praying, reading the scriptures, going to church, serving, etc) and seek for His "hands" to be laid on the person whom we love who is "dieing"/already dead, or perhaps never really been "alive" in this earth life in the first place.

Sometimes the process of the Savior coming into the person's life, might take time... and on that road, we may feel or find out the person has actually completely "died spiritually". Temptations of hopelessness, grief, sorrow, regret, resentment, sadness, bitterness, anger for that person to ever be made alive again may come tempting...thoughts about how the loved one has/had been sick too long, and for whatever reason, whether they didn't know the gospel, had it to a point but forsook it or didn't want it in the first place--they "died" while we were on our journey rushing to bring the Savior to them. We must/need to take on the Savior's advice to not fear, but only believe in a hope for them to "become" alive.

But our awesome Father has a great plan. And regardless of the "time" *prayers, pleading, fasting to have the Savior come and "lay" his hands upon the person we love--God's timing is perfect! And their spirit can come back again! They can be made whole!

A very important KEY AFTER someone has Christ enter, or come back into their life, is the commandment the Savior gives right after the spirit was restored to Jairus's daughter! The person who is now "alive" (whether alive again or for the "first" time) with "Christ"...NEEDS/MUST be fed!!! And not just anything, but they must be fed with "meat"=substance!

When someone has Christ brought into their life, and they are made "alive" and arise to higher standards/ways of life then they were (remember, he took her from where she was laying, by the hand, and commanded her to arise. Whether she was on the floor, or a bed, just sitting up would bring her to a "higher" place then she had previously been in when she was in her "dead" position.

From Mark's account Jairus's daughter not only arose, but she walked! Even if she was a short 12 year-old say even just 4 feet tall... spiritually speaking, her arising and walking brought her 4 feet higher "closer to God" then she had previously been!

When someone has the gospel and principles of truth enter their life, and it causes their actions to come up/arise even four feet closer to the Savior/Heavenly Father-- WE must be prepared to feed them immediately! Feed that person who has just "awaken" with a calling, with love, with challenges in the gospel. WITH GOSPEL MEAT!

I pondered over what they might have given this girl to eat. Did they have something on hand, or did they quickly, with time and effort, prepare food for her. Either way, the preparation needed to follow the commandment of giving her something to eat was there! And a body recently "raised" brought closer to Christ, is immediately in need of spiritual MEAT!!!!!!!! Even with the spirit of the gospel breathed into our souls--that spirit/truths can not be sustained without "meat"!

Jairus's daughter, her father nor the Savior, could/can force her to actually "eat" the food, she still has to choose to do so. But we are commanded that food/meat be given, and from someone who has just been previously absent from "spiritually living", I think most occasions, the newly spirit/light receiving individual will notice the hunger and the need for that meat, and such a person is most likely to "gobble" whatever is given to them right up! They still have the choice of eating it or not, but may be be prepared in serving them rich substance... a buffet line of truths, love, compassion, service, callings, support--serving them food that will keep them alive in Christ!

Oh for visiting & home teachers! Oh to all brothers and sisters in the gospel! Oh when someone comes back, or for the first time--whatever amount of rising they do, may I be prepared to give them "meat"!

I don't know if I am making any clear ideas on this, but so strong are/were the impressions of this beauitful insight...

We must feed right away, those that arise in any level to their commitments/desires of being like/coming to Christ.

Jesus is the Christ!

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is true!

Literally--onward and upward--brings one to Christ! And Gospel Meat is what keeps us on that onward and upward path! Ironic little circle!

"...her spirit came again, and she arose straightway: and he commanded to give her meat."

STANDING STILL

Meet Lee and Gerry Shepherd--My adopted grandparents!
For the 4th of July weekend we happened to run into each other at the Scofield fair. It is always quite emotional for me to be around these wonderful, faithful folks, for they mean so much to me.

Gerry has been fighting Thyroid and Lymphoma Cancer for some time now. Food has not been her best friend lately.

Thursday I felt impressed that I needed to go to their house the next day. So strong was the impression that I planned my whole morning around the visit.

As I drove to their house, I noticed that Lee's car was gone. As I went and knocked on the door, I was a little quizzical as to why the Lord would send me to an empty house...but I have a testimony of spending a whole night driving around to see different girls (following promptings as to what house to go to) none of which were home--just so that someone in the stake would drive by at the exact time I was getting in my car from the last empty house visit. She call me up because she saw me going to my car and a needed conversation was given in depth for 20 mins. Why all the empty home visits with promptings? Just for the one Stake gal who needed a friend. God does care about the one!

Gerry finally came to the side door. She didn't open the door but just started signing to me. She had medical gloves on her hands.

I stood on my tippy toes and pressed my face against the top of the glass to make out what she was trying to tell me:.

I was not to come in. She was to be in her house by herself for over a week to try and get her body to respond/become more healthy. I could feel her frustration and sorrow as I watched her sign.

I felt helpless. I couldn't give her a hug, I couldn't wipe away her tears. All I could do was sign through the glass and press an "I Love You" hand to the window.

What a brave, strong woman of God.

I walked back to my car as my cheeks glistening in the sun. I knew only the Savior knew of her loneliness and her struggle to fight the cancer, her fears for the future, and her faith for the present. I know that although her husband and daughter had to leave her house and she was physically alone--I know she was not "alone". I pulled away weeping while I prayed aloud...

What a strength to me! Endurance and long suffering in all things. Thanks Grandma Shepherd for the example you have set up. I know you love God. I know He loves you!

GRATITUDE

These last few days have been a whirl win of emotions. Seemed like Satan was out for blood.

Sunday, I felt I had every reason in the world to pray and plead for help but during church, Yazmin reminded everyone that we need to be filled with gratitude. I had the distinct impression while sitting in sacrament that for the rest of the day I was only to speak gratitude in my prayers. A few situations came up that I was floored with what to do and my natural reaction is to pray for help--but I was reminded again by the spirit that I was only to pray words of gratitude and thanks.

It was a very interesting, but extremely rewarding day of prayer. At times I felt frustrated and like a ship without a rudder, however the Lord did not forsake me! He taught me some important lessons, for which I am grateful for. Sometimes we are to just count our many blessings- naming them one by one- and then we ARE surprised by what the Lord done.

How is it possible for me to forget all the Lord has done?! For he spoils me every day. And yet in the middle of my beautiful garden, I sometimes only focus not on all the flowers and wonderful fruit trees, but rather the mosquitoes and black biting ants. When I focus on those "little" guys, I miss all the amazing things that make up the whole garden!

Count your many blessings was my theme song for Sunday, and it helped me get through some very trying moments.

TEMPLE

Today brought the temple! I haven't gone to the 5:40 AM session in a long time. Usually I make the 6 AM session, but the 20 mins earlier seems to be a natural killer at times! :) But this morning I went, and the place was packed. I was filled with love and admiration for those who seemed so perky and happy to be in the temple that early.

I was able to spend 15 mins alone in the celestial room. Oh how I want my house to be like His house!

VISITING TEACHING

Tonight I went VTing and was touched by my wonderful companion Katie. The lesson was on Temples and having the girls prepare to go to them. Katie found a book from Dessert Book for each of the girls to help them prepare for the temple. She was so excited to give them the book. I watched as her eyes twinkled and she lit up like a Christmas tree as she gave them out.

Oh it was a beautiful thing to see people do the things they are good at. Serving, listening, giving, hugging, talking, singing--whatever their element is that they like to use to share with/bless others--it is a beautiful thing to watch!

STOP, AND STAND STILL

Tonight I finished D&C 5 at the church. Four times it talks about being humble. There are great blessings for being humble and some pretty harsh consequences when we are not. That was for me. And even more, verse 34 seemed to leap into my heart and in a quite way, that only the spirit can do, I felt the words of the verse were written just for me.
God spoke to my heart: Stop worrying, stop stressing and stand still Bryn. I will prepare away for things I have promised you.

I apologized for how I had been and begged for help to be better and to some how get past all the feelings I had been feeling....and for the first time in 4 days, I was filled with great peace. I was filled with a resolve to trust Him more fully and to not worry. He IS in control and that is okay.

So for this random post that I totally broke my bed curfew to type :)--know that I am a counter of my blessings! One by one and am/do ENJOY all the things God has done! I am confident in/with the Gardner of my garden, and I have full faith in His plans to help me grow and become as beautiful inside and out as I promised Him I would be. I have STOPPED my worrying and am standing still.

Daughter of God--in the making.