Thursday, July 30, 2009

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

STANDING STILL

Meet Lee and Gerry Shepherd--My adopted grandparents!
For the 4th of July weekend we happened to run into each other at the Scofield fair. It is always quite emotional for me to be around these wonderful, faithful folks, for they mean so much to me.

Gerry has been fighting Thyroid and Lymphoma Cancer for some time now. Food has not been her best friend lately.

Thursday I felt impressed that I needed to go to their house the next day. So strong was the impression that I planned my whole morning around the visit.

As I drove to their house, I noticed that Lee's car was gone. As I went and knocked on the door, I was a little quizzical as to why the Lord would send me to an empty house...but I have a testimony of spending a whole night driving around to see different girls (following promptings as to what house to go to) none of which were home--just so that someone in the stake would drive by at the exact time I was getting in my car from the last empty house visit. She call me up because she saw me going to my car and a needed conversation was given in depth for 20 mins. Why all the empty home visits with promptings? Just for the one Stake gal who needed a friend. God does care about the one!

Gerry finally came to the side door. She didn't open the door but just started signing to me. She had medical gloves on her hands.

I stood on my tippy toes and pressed my face against the top of the glass to make out what she was trying to tell me:.

I was not to come in. She was to be in her house by herself for over a week to try and get her body to respond/become more healthy. I could feel her frustration and sorrow as I watched her sign.

I felt helpless. I couldn't give her a hug, I couldn't wipe away her tears. All I could do was sign through the glass and press an "I Love You" hand to the window.

What a brave, strong woman of God.

I walked back to my car as my cheeks glistening in the sun. I knew only the Savior knew of her loneliness and her struggle to fight the cancer, her fears for the future, and her faith for the present. I know that although her husband and daughter had to leave her house and she was physically alone--I know she was not "alone". I pulled away weeping while I prayed aloud...

What a strength to me! Endurance and long suffering in all things. Thanks Grandma Shepherd for the example you have set up. I know you love God. I know He loves you!

GRATITUDE

These last few days have been a whirl win of emotions. Seemed like Satan was out for blood.

Sunday, I felt I had every reason in the world to pray and plead for help but during church, Yazmin reminded everyone that we need to be filled with gratitude. I had the distinct impression while sitting in sacrament that for the rest of the day I was only to speak gratitude in my prayers. A few situations came up that I was floored with what to do and my natural reaction is to pray for help--but I was reminded again by the spirit that I was only to pray words of gratitude and thanks.

It was a very interesting, but extremely rewarding day of prayer. At times I felt frustrated and like a ship without a rudder, however the Lord did not forsake me! He taught me some important lessons, for which I am grateful for. Sometimes we are to just count our many blessings- naming them one by one- and then we ARE surprised by what the Lord done.

How is it possible for me to forget all the Lord has done?! For he spoils me every day. And yet in the middle of my beautiful garden, I sometimes only focus not on all the flowers and wonderful fruit trees, but rather the mosquitoes and black biting ants. When I focus on those "little" guys, I miss all the amazing things that make up the whole garden!

Count your many blessings was my theme song for Sunday, and it helped me get through some very trying moments.

TEMPLE

Today brought the temple! I haven't gone to the 5:40 AM session in a long time. Usually I make the 6 AM session, but the 20 mins earlier seems to be a natural killer at times! :) But this morning I went, and the place was packed. I was filled with love and admiration for those who seemed so perky and happy to be in the temple that early.

I was able to spend 15 mins alone in the celestial room. Oh how I want my house to be like His house!

VISITING TEACHING

Tonight I went VTing and was touched by my wonderful companion Katie. The lesson was on Temples and having the girls prepare to go to them. Katie found a book from Dessert Book for each of the girls to help them prepare for the temple. She was so excited to give them the book. I watched as her eyes twinkled and she lit up like a Christmas tree as she gave them out.

Oh it was a beautiful thing to see people do the things they are good at. Serving, listening, giving, hugging, talking, singing--whatever their element is that they like to use to share with/bless others--it is a beautiful thing to watch!

STOP, AND STAND STILL

Tonight I finished D&C 5 at the church. Four times it talks about being humble. There are great blessings for being humble and some pretty harsh consequences when we are not. That was for me. And even more, verse 34 seemed to leap into my heart and in a quite way, that only the spirit can do, I felt the words of the verse were written just for me.
God spoke to my heart: Stop worrying, stop stressing and stand still Bryn. I will prepare away for things I have promised you.

I apologized for how I had been and begged for help to be better and to some how get past all the feelings I had been feeling....and for the first time in 4 days, I was filled with great peace. I was filled with a resolve to trust Him more fully and to not worry. He IS in control and that is okay.

So for this random post that I totally broke my bed curfew to type :)--know that I am a counter of my blessings! One by one and am/do ENJOY all the things God has done! I am confident in/with the Gardner of my garden, and I have full faith in His plans to help me grow and become as beautiful inside and out as I promised Him I would be. I have STOPPED my worrying and am standing still.

Daughter of God--in the making.

Friday, July 10, 2009

MIGHTIER THAN LABAN

This past week I finished reading the Book of Mormon. This time around was with a new pair of scriptures. My mission set has become quite close to dieing and in my efforts having new scriptures I have found the joy of marking my clean white pages all up! I have enjoyed the beautiful insights that have come to me as I have pondered over each verse. I have found that it is hard to find a verse that doesn't have something profoundly important within it's words.

I have moved on to read the Doctrine and Covenants...hoping to understand more fully the truths found in there. Even with switching over to the D&C I have started my Book of Mormon study over. I have found that my day is not quite put together unless I read out of the Book of Mormon. I have studied other scriptures for intense periods of time and have found great truths and hidden treasures--but at the end of the day something was missing... THE BOOK OF MORMON! OH Oh I love the Book and know that it is true! It has changed my life and continues to change my life.

1 Nephi 4:1 had a profound impact on me this week.

And it came to pass that I spake unto my brethren, saying: Let us go up again unto Jerusalem, and let us be faithful in keeping the commandments of the Lord; for behold he is mightier than all the earth, then why not mightier than Laban and his fifty, yea, or even than his tens of thousands?

Nephi and his brothers have already tried to get the brass plates twice from Laban. First time, Laman went and asked for them... Laban tried to kill him. Then all the brothers went into their house and gathered all their gold/silver and everything precious. They tried to trade all that they had for the brass plates. Laban lusted after their riches and sent his servants out to kill Nephi and his brothers so he could obtain their riches. It was all left behind as they fled for their lives. Laman and Lemuel were not so happy after loosing all their family's goods so they picked up a rod and started hitting Nephi and Sam. An angel of the Lord stopped them and reprimanded them for their actions. The Angel left and Laman and Lemuel start to murmuer again about how are they going to get the plates.

Verse one is the very next comment from Nehpi to his brothers.
So for me--what "Labans" am I facing? An addiction, a bad habit, a faith stopper, or a bad situation. Whatever MY Laban is--the Lord is mightier then it!

RAIN STOPPED

The picture above was just taken last month while I was on a business trip in Park City. There were two different events that spanned the length of the whole week. I saw many amazing miracles! Some so deeply effected me that I had to go into the hotel guest bathroom and weep because I was so overwhelmed. Within two days, two dear friends reminded me of the power of prayer--all we need do is ask.

Patti had a karaoke night planned for all of our Leadership consultants. The hotel had this little restaurant that if we used the outside area, we would have room enough to eat dinner and then have some fun karaoke.

In running around making sure different areas were set up, I lost track of Patti so I went up to the restaurant. I looked outside to a very heavy wet rainstorm. I walked into the restaurant...in order to fit without being too squished, we needed to use the patio of the restaurant...but with all the rain, that just wasn't going to happen.

As I walked out of the restaurant looking at all the falling rain, I silently prayed asked Heavenly Father to stop the rain so that Patti's planned evening would not be ruined. I asked that by some miracle that not only did the rain need to stop, but it needed to come off quickly from the roof so that we didn't have people having to step out on the patio with drops falling on their heads.

I felt as if it was just me and Heavenly Father on the mountain.

I walked outside the hotel onto a platform covered by an awning. I had a full view of the mountain side before me. And there--I watched as literally the blanket of heavy rain pulled across the sky starting from the right and moving left. I walked as I watched the blanket of rain sweep across the mountainside. By the time I had walked to the edge of the awning, the rain had completely stopped. I stepped out in the clearing trying to see if there was any mist still in the air... there was none! I did not feel one drop!

From inside I heard someone yell something about a rainbow... so I walked down the walk way I saw the view in the picture above. I could not take the smile off my face as I knew it was just a "there you go" for Patti from Heavenly Father. A waiter boy came out to where I was to admire the rainbow. He commented how cool the weather had just been and I turned to him and told him he just witnessed a miracle from God.
I walked up the steps (3 mins or so after the rain storm had moved) and looked at the patio of the restaurant. The drips in this picture were the only drips I saw come off of the roof!!

I ran to go find Patti and tell her of what God just did for her. I finally found her downstairs and as I spewed out the miracle she mentioned that she had already moved the karaoke to an inside room in the Hotel. She said it was wonderful that the rain had stopped but we couldn't make people sit on a wet patio. I felt that it was just a test of all of our faith and I wanted to protest with her that it would be okay, but the moment was already intensely busy, so I held my peace and thanked Heavenly Father for stopping the rain and for sending the rainbow for Patti.

We went up stairs and gathered for dinner. This was right after the rain storm-- and with the 20 mins we took getting ready for dinner--here are the pictures we took of us eating out on the patio--it was completely dry!

(Boys will be boys! :D)

Now what is so significant with this whole thing--we had a Laban before us! THE RAIN. God was mightier then the rain. And even though he stopped the rain and everything could have worked out in the restaurant, another way was made available in a different room to do the karaoke...which ended up being a blessing because we were pretty crazy with our karaoke night! ha ha. But what if our Laban is not the rain? What if it is a boy/girl/money/credit card bill/death of a loved one/lack of employment/family member? HE IS MIGHTIER THAN ALL OUR LABANS.

This is not to say that every time we pray for the "rain" to stop, the Lord stops it! There is an awesome song that talks about praying for the rain to stop, and mad when it doesn't, but we didn't know all those praying for it to rain. Our Father in Heaven is merciful and he loves us, and longs to bless us and show forth his might before our Labans! Whatever Labans we are facing! That day he had a blessing waiting to stop the rain. What if we hadn't asked?

Prayer- Bible dictionary-
Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other. The object of prayer is not to change the will of God, but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant, but that are made conditional on our asking for them. Blessings require some work or effort on our part before we can obtain them. Prayer is a form of work, and is an appointed means for obtaining the highest of all blessings.
Conditional on our asking for them. What blessings are we missing out out merely because we just don't ask!?

Now, His will WILL be done! I believe if we have the faith to ask, and God does have an opinion on whatever, He will let us know. And that way we go about doing His will! And if it is His will for us to go forward and use the brains he has granted us to have, then that is great too! We move forward! But if there are blessings along the way, I for one want to be praying and asking for them!

He is mightier than Laban.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

DECLARING HIS DOINGS!

For what ever reason Satan has been out to destroy lately! Ha, I know, what an understatement.

Yesterday I was not particularly down--I like to count myself as an optimist. I am convinced there is a silver lining in any situation, problem, struggle, and consequence. But for whatever reason, my emotions have been close to the surface these past few weeks.

My sweet visiting teacher texted me that she would like to stop by and that she was embarrassed for stopping by on the last day of the month. I don't think anyone should beat themselves up for visiting teaching--especially if it is the last day of the month! The Lord gives us deadlines for a reason! Recommends have expiration dates, callings in the church are for periods of times, and home teaching/visiting teaching are asked to be accomplished before the end of the month! The deadline is there to give us a goal point. My dad says "If you don't have goal posts [declared/written down], you will end up running in circles."

With visiting teaching, the goal post is before the month is over. Now, by choosing to accomplish the goal before the end of the month, usually is a great stress reliever. The pressure is off. Same with my weekly temple trips. My goal is to go to the temple before the end of the week. Same blessings for going on Tuesday as there are on Friday or Saturday--the difference is the pressure that happens at the end of the week and the stress of trying to actually get to the temple weighs heavily if I wait until the end of the week to go.

Oh what a tangent for just wanting to say, that I was very proud of this sweet sister for coming even the last day! She hit the goal with flying colors in my book.

When my visiting teacher sent me a text to make a visit, I literally had a window of 30 mins in which she could come. Knowing that she lives nearly 30 mins away from me, I just didn't think it was going to come to pass. But sure enough she text me and said she would be to my place by 6. After weeping a little I smiled and looked up towards the ceiling. I knew that God was sending me this sister...

6 came and she was at my place. We sat and chatted about the exciting things happening in her life. She told me of the Lord telling her to not give up on a particular kid. And then she was told through personal revelation that she needed to tell the kid that she liked him. WOW, I love following promptings, but that would have been a hard one to follow--especially when she thought the kid had no interest in her, they had never dated, in fact she has never had a boyfriend/relationship before! What a trust!

She followed the prompting and told the kid she liked him and much to her surprise he said he had been dropping hints of liking her for months--she was completely clueless to them! :) Bishop just gave a few girls some counsel that when we think that we are dropping obvious hints to the boys--we are not, they are clueless! We need to be bold and blunt with how we feel about them. Obviously this goes a little on both sides! ;) ha ha.

She then told me that on the way to my house, she was listening to her ipod and she received the impression that she needed to start praying. So this faithful sister, being obedient to the revelation given to her, immediately turned off her ipod and started to say a prayer while she drove. She didn't know what to pray for, but just started to pray over her family, her boyfriend etc. All of a sudden she found everyone on the freeway coming to a halt. She slammed on her brakes and those in front of her and back of her did the same. To try to avoid hitting the car in front of her, she pulled out into the side lane. (I am not sure if it was the carpool lane or the right shoulder area??) but at that very moment of pulling out of her lane she was told by the spirit to go back to the lane she was in. As she swerved back--still trying to bring her car to a halt without hitting the car in front of her, a truck that was somewhere behind her pulled violently (from trying to stop) into the lane she had just been in-- he was also trying to avoid hitting everyone. She said he almost side swiped her car anyway, but had she been in the lane, she would have been hit by him for sure. It could have been fatal.

We both wept with gratitude. Gratitude that the spirit prompted and even more that she was willing to immediately follow.

I am convinced that rule, rather then the exception, is that miracles happen over the times when we are tending to His flock! Whether it be VT or HT or just doing our callings. God opens doors, sends angles, and often gives us wings to fly through impossible flaming hoops and invisible passageways! So was it yesterday for my sweet friend.

So was she just doing her visiting teaching?! Regardless of what you thing, can I take a little bit of a snotty approach and tell you what I know?!

I know that God sent my visiting teacher yesterday to remind me of how I used to pray! I have become more casual in my praying habits. I still kneel Morning, noon, and night, and try always to have a prayer in my heart, but the faith in my prayers has dropped a few notches. I have not been praying of the smallest of things, and leaving my mouth service for those that seem to be big and pressing. But this sweet sister, I KNOW the Lord sent to remind me, "Bryn, you are to pray over everything. Council with me in all your doings. You used to, remember? Even over little things. Remember what prayers I answered, small, big, insignificant to the natural man... REMEMBER!" Okay- so I didn't hear these words, but I felt them. I felt them in my heart and my mind. My sweet visiting teacher, though she isn't aware of her visits impact on me, was His tool in reminding me tenderly and kindly that there are power in prayers. And I need to go back to how I used to pray. Praying with great power and faith. I felt no reprimand, just a simple assurance and a tender reminder that how I used to do things was good, and okay and that I could go back to that way of praying.

After my sweet sister's visit in my only 30 min window for the day, last day of the month-just a girl wanting to show God that she would do what he asked her to do, blessed me deeply/significantly. I was filled with a resloution that I had habits that I need to cling back to. And all of this came, not in condemnation, or reprimanding--it all came in love and peace. A quietness... to stand a little taller, be a little more faith filled, to pray over and for anything/anyone! To adopt back into my life the things that I know work for me regardless of how others view them.

So with this thought... At the end of my scripture study today, I was thumbing through my Book of Mormon and opened to the 2 Nephi 22. Such a good chapter--compare to Isaiah 12:
And in that day thou shalt say: O Lord, I will praise thee; though thou wast angry with me thine anger is turned away, and thou comfortedest me.
Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid; for the Lord Jehovah is my strength and my song; he also has become my salvation.
Therefore, with joy shall ye draw water out of the wells of salvation.
And in that day shall ye say: Praise the Lord, call upon his name, declare his doings among the people, make mention that his name is exalted.
Sing unto the Lord; for he hath done excellent things; this is known in all the earth.
Cry out and shout, thou inhabitant of Zion; for great is the Holy One of Israel in the midst of thee.

In my scriptures, when the Lord answers something in my life with a verse or I feel the spirit confirming what I read was true--I put a spiral swirl over the verse and write out to the side what revelation I received or I state what the answer was to me.
...This is very personal to me and I do not share it for me but for the praise of God and for the fact I just feel I should. My swirl is over vs 4. In my scriptures I wrote this last year:

"And in that day shall ye say: Praise the Lord, call upon his name, declare his doings among the people, make mention that his name is exalted."

"2.22.08 - I have been struggling with the idea of sharing all the miracles I see with others. I have not wanted the praise of men- and I don't want them to think for one moment that it is because of how I prayed or anything to do with me. This past week I have pondered over stop telling people of His goodness--this scripture came with the feeling and words that I do need to share and I will continue to pray to the Lord and ask that he allow me to give Him all praise and all glory. This scripture gave me much comfort."


So may it be known to anyone God has read this blog--I DECLARE HIS DOINGS!! I speak of things I know for myself. God is a God of miracles. He does answer prayers! Small ones, big ones... ALL SINCERE ones! The smallest sparrow falls and he knows it. We are much greater then a sparrow (although I think they are pretty great.) We must follow our impressions and promptings! They can be felt more when we sincerely, pray and study the scriptures daily. God will give us missionary opportunities! We just have to ask! He does open doors, and amazingly enough he allows us/gives us the ability to A.S.K.! Thanks for dad reminding me, A=Ask S=Seek K=Knock and in return of using our agency to A.S.K we will receive R.F.O. R=Receive F=Find O=Open.

How does one receive things from the Holy Ghost, one might ask?! It all starts from the fruit of Repentance!!! Moroni 8:25-26
Repentance=
Baptism=by faith=
fulfilling commandments=
brings a remission of sins=
which brings meekness/lowliness of heart=
with those in place
COMETH the VISITATION of the Holy Ghost=
which fills us with hope and PERFECT love=
which love endures by diligence=
unto prayer=
until the end shall come=
DWELLING WITH GOD!!

All those things are the fruits of repentance. What a powerful tool I need in my life every day!!

I love that it says that the end "shall" come. There IS hope smiling brightly before us! It's not if the end will come, or when, IT SHALL COME!! That means an end to our suffering, or woes, or our sorrows, our strugglings.

I am declaring that I know that God lives. I know that Jesus is the Christ. I know that God hears our prayers and answers them. Big ones, small ones! I know we can become better. I know we can have hope and should have faith in the things God has told us will happen.

Oh to be born in a day when there is so much truth on the earth! Oh to my wonderful parents who had the courage to have this number 5--to put aside their desires/dreams so that I could fulfill/have mine. My soul rejoices and I am consumed with gratitude, wonder and awh.

Joseph Smith is a true prophet. I know he did see God the Father and Jesus Christ. Through him, the gospel was restored to the earth.

The atonement is for all of us to partake of daily. Christ is the author and finisher of my faith!

I testify that He lives!
-In the Name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Declaring his Doings!!!