Tuesday, December 18, 2012

HAPPINESS IS...

Happiness is...
Walking out of an interview and seeing this

Happiness is...
God allowing true love, again.

Happiness is...



Beautiful, thoughtful blossoms.

Happiness is...
A friend's whole day off spent in labors of love.

Happiness is...
This conversation:
Me: Beaner- would you please say the prayer so we can drive to the cabin safe?
Brynnlee: Sure, dear Heavenly Father please help us not get sea sick, bless mom and dad and that we will be safe and happy.
....reflection of my driving?!
Then all the way up to the cabin this conversation to place. "Bryndi is the vocalist, Ireland does the electric guitar, Doogs the trumpet and I will be the harp. The song will be Families can be forever.." said cute little Brynnlee as she "directed" our musical production. They switched instruments around for 30+ mins. Brynnlee scolding Doogs and Ironman for not coming in on the "right" places-- ! I chuckled off and on in between my "vocalist" parts. :D
Happiness is... Doogy's little grin!


Happiness is...
Friends calling to let me know that they had said a prayer for me to make it home from work safe and that it was bad outside, so I should "leave" asap.
 Happiness is... someone thinking to pray for me out of the blue, with no request from me.

Happiness is...
Time with Grandma Ratcliffe!

Happiness is... when a puzzle with non-ending plain red, tiny pieces is completed! :)

Happiness is...
Coming home to my bedroom door decked out in Glitter, snowflake goodness!

Happiness is...

A thoughtful co-worker making me my "own" cucumber, mushroom, tomato "smores" because I can't do our Smores day at work. Seriously, the platter made me want to cry.

Happiness is... a cucumber ordainment as a reminder of all God has helped me accomplish with my physical life. The ordainment hangs over my desk as a symbol of love and that others support me in my continuing journey of health.

Happiness is...
The Mormon Tabernacle Concert tickets (THANK YOU AMY AND MORGAN!!!).

Happiness is... Richard caring and loving and being MY brothers keeper.
Happiness is... answered prayers.

Happiness is...
looking over at Citlalli through out the (incredible, spirit filled concert) and seeing her grin as big as I was--throughout every piece!

Happiness is... being around others who enjoy sacred music as much as I do.

Happiness is...
Myrna back in the temple after almost three years!

Happiness is... her basking in the moment as much as I was.
Happiness is... this conversation:
Me: Myrna, this has been a perfect day!
Myrna: You know, people talk about having a perfect day--and I have never understood or believed them. But I think you are right. This HAS been a perfect day... [then with a shock and fast realization she blurted] We better SHUT UP! The day is not over yet.
Me: [knocking on wood while chuckling at her "Shut Up"!]
Happiness is...
Discovering a safety net that apparently has been there the whole time, but was undetected by my eyes until it was covered in snow. What an insight to the blessings God already has in places of my life--that go undetected until a storm hits.... but His love was/is always there. Sometimes it takes a storm to help recognize and see what I could not see before. 

Happiness is...
Early morning legos.

Happiness is...
a Mr. Potato head eyeballed snowman fiance right outside my front door!! Guess my goal of meeting someone in 2012 really did work! ;) (Jinger says he has a bit of a cold heart, but he can be warmed over.) :)

Happiness is... hearing my Brother and sister-in-law giggle and laugh together.
Happiness is... a good hug.
Happiness is... is the inspired, spur of the moment beautifully played prelude music--played before a church meeting.
Happiness is... following through on a prompting.
Happiness is... being able to get on my knees to pray.
Happiness is... is being able to get up off my knees after praying. ;)
Happiness is... the comment out of my newly turned 7 nephew as he knocked on his dad's door in the middle of the night, crying because he didn't feel good. I scooped him up and took him to rock with me in the living room. He told me that his mind was dizzy and he wasn't feeling good. I told him I was sorry... he then looked up at me and said, "I want to ask my dad for a blessing. I think he would give me one."
Happiness is... a worthy priesthood holder.
Happiness is... the priesthood of God.

Happiness is...

God's family. 

 Happiness is... my family.

Happiness is... Jesus Christ.

Tis the season to love and forgive, hope and cherish, work and serve, accept and appreciate. 


I am grateful for fasting.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

HE COULD HAVE BEEN "DONE"--BUT THERE WAS MORE TO BE HAD!


The last few weeks in the temple, when I have any waiting/prep time I have felt impressed to open and read Enos. I LOVE ENOS! I would love to name a daughter Enos. I am always drawn to the story, for I feel it is so closely related to my own conversion. I love reading how his soul hungered and he kneeled down before his Maker and cried until him in mighty prayer (Enos 1:4). Oh how I can totally relate!
   So the impression to re-read Enos for the how many weeks in a row, I figured the Lord was trying to teach me something and I assumed that it had to do do with my favorite part... the hungering and seeking God in mighty prayer. (...well one of my favorite parts! There are so many good things in the one chapter.)
   But on Monday the Lord had my mind catch hold of two little words I had not yet given any special attention too...
And my soul hungered; and I kneeled down before my Maker, and I cried unto him in mighty prayer and supplication for mine own soul; and all the day long did I cry unto him; yea, and when the night came I did still raise my voice high that it reached the heavens.

And there came a voice unto me, saying: Enos, thy sins are forgiven thee, and thou shalt be blessed.

And I, Enos, knew that God could not lie; wherefore, my guilt was swept away.

And I said: Lord, how is it done?

And he said unto me: Because of thy faith in Christ, whom thou hast never before heard nor seen. And many years pass away before he shall manifest himself in the flesh; wherefore, go to, thy faith hath made thee whole.
 The story goes on after this, but that is what is so interesting. Enos is told that it is because of his Faith in Christ (*that is the reason why his sins are forgiven) but he is told... "wherefore, go to, ... " Go to--that is another way of saying, alright move on, next, "GO TO". The Lord had answered his mighty prayer in such a profound way, a beauitful way. He had been praying about the welfare of his soul. (Which is a pretty deep thing to be praying about in the first place.) The very think he was praying about, he got an answer on. For example sake it is like working on a hard project and at the end of the project, with the result achieved, one brushes their hands off and moves on/forward with whatever comes up. In a sense, the prayer was "done". Go to.

But what is so beauitful is that Enos was not done! He could have walked away and been satisfied with the very awesome revelation that he had been given! Choice stuff... but the very next verse after he was told to "go to"... reads:
Now, it came to pass that when I had heard these words I began to feel a desire for the welfare of my brethren, the Nephites; wherefore, I did pour out my whole soul unto God for them.
He had his answer. He was "done". BUT GOD HAD MORE TO GIVE--however he will not force the "more" to be had. ...

"More" has to be sought after. There are several more verses of intense revelation that God was willing/did grant, because Enos asked. BUT he had already answered his prayer and told him to "go to". Enos could have just stopped there, but his desires came on for his bretheren and their souls so he continued on his journey in prayer!  **Now I don't' know if this is over the course of many days or all started in one setting... but "go to" was a nice way of saying okay I am finished with that revelation... As I pondered this idea in the temple my mind was flooded with the words from Richard G. Scott's talk:
In that environment, strong impressions began to flow to me again. I wrote them down. The message included specific counsel on how to become more effective as an instrument in the hands of the Lord. I received such an outpouring of impressions that were so personal that I felt it was not appropriate to record them in the midst of a Sunday School class. I sought a more private location, where I continued to write the feelings that flooded into my mind and heart as faithfully as possible. After each powerful impression was recorded, I pondered the feelings I had received to determine if I had accurately expressed them in writing. As a result, I made a few minor changes to what had been written. Then I studied their meaning and application in my own life.

Subsequently I prayed, reviewing with the Lord what I thought I had been taught by the Spirit. When a feeling of peace came, I thanked Him for the guidance given. I was then impressed to ask, “Was there yet more to be given?” I received further impressions, and the process of writing down the impressions, pondering, and praying for confirmation was repeated. Again I was prompted to ask, “Is there more I should know?” And there was. When that last, most sacred experience was concluded, I had received some of the most precious, specific, personal direction one could hope to obtain in this life. Had I not responded to the first impressions and recorded them, I would not have received the last, most precious guidance.

What I have described is not an isolated experience. It embodies several true principles regarding communication from the Lord to His children here on earth. I believe that you can leave the most precious, personal direction of the Spirit unheard because you do not respond to, record, and apply the first promptings that come to you.

Impressions of the Spirit can come in response to urgent prayer or unsolicited when needed. Sometimes the Lord reveals truth to you when you are not actively seeking it, such as when you are in danger and do not know it. However, the Lord will not force you to learn. You must exercise your agency to authorize the Spirit to teach you. As you make this a practice in your life, you will be more perceptive to the feelings that come with spiritual guidance. Then, when that guidance comes, sometimes when you least expect it, you will recognize it more easily.  --To Acquire Spiritual Guidance--
Yes, you might just enjoy re-reading the whole talk! CLICK HERE. Brilliant!!

God did not force Elder Scott to receive more revelation. Just as He did not force Enos to receive promised/covenants for future generations. Choice blessings. Because Elder Scott kept asking to see if there was more that he should know, we was given more information until finally when he asked again.. he was given a "most sacred experience...most precious, specific, personal direction... Had [he] not responded to the first impressions and recorded them, [he] would have not received the last, most precious guidance." ARE YOU FREAKING OUT!?! This is such a beauitful truth and I LOVED it when I first heard and then studied the talk. But now to find this exact application to what happened with Enos?!?!?!

God will not force sacred/choice revelation on us. Even when we seek, He does answer prayers in His way and in His timing. And often, He may have more for us to obtain, but again will not take away our use of agency by forcing the revelation on us. He simply waits and the blessed council that appears over and over in the scriptures, He waits for us to ask, is there more. Enos found more! Choice more promises. Elder Scott found more! And had he not continue to ask, I believe the Lord would not have forced him to have the ending revelation of it being "most precious, specific, personal direction one could hope to obtain in this life."

I have in the past, after studying Elder Scott's talk on several occasions asked if there was "more" even after the Lord had given me choice info and basically was allowing me the choice to "go to". And on the occasions I sought to see if there was more, I was given more!

Sadly, I am pretty much rusted over in this truth I once applied to my own life. But Enos's example and the flood reminder of Elder Scott's words have filled me with the desire to seek for the "more" even after the approved "go to" has been given.


Like the start of a sunset... if you risk staying "asking if there is more"... and if there is "more"... how often sweeter (wating around to see if the sky gets more brilliant) that more is!


Wow-- I am freaking out! :) Just another friendly reminder for me to "ask". 


I am grateful for a dad who was inspired to write a book on "Intentional Parenting"
pouring his whole soul into a project he felt inspired to do. Grateful for his
devoted Editing wife, gracious sister-in-law and LOTS of others who
gave input and feed back on the book. And I am even more
grateful for the offer that just came through on Monday 
 of "We want to publish your book"! WAY TO GO
DAD, following and having faith in what you 
felt impressed to do!!!

 

Congrats to my awesome gourmet cooking, host/serving, fun loving, not giving up on impressions, trusting in God, faith-filled, going to be published dad!

Monday, November 26, 2012

THOUGHTS OF A 30 YEAR OLD


   Reflective mood: perhaps it is because I said goodbye to my 20s and with arms wide open I embrace my 30s... perhaps it is that much of what we have recorded about the Savior was in His early 30s...or is it the fact that if I live until 90, I have just completed 1/3 of this life... God has brought me so much. I am nothing without Him, and yet to Him I am everything.
   I am grateful for the statement "God is fully aware that you and I are not perfect. … God is also fully aware that the people you think are perfect are not."--Pres. Uchtdorf  How that applies for me. I am not perfect, and those who think I am just don't know me well enough or perhaps love me so much that their love blankets my imperfections... how grateful I am that so many choose to love than pick at my flaws. And I am not mopey, but be not deceived, I am not perfect and struggle with my own personal weaknesses.
   A friend sent me an email late last night which I happened to read at 6am this morning that asked me some pretty straight forward questions.
Bryndi, thank you so much for always looking to help me and serve me. I know your heart and know you always have the desire to serve and love. Would you please stop for a second and think a little more of YOU!!! It doesn't mean you will be selfish or prideful, because you are not. What do YOU want? What do YOU desire? I know you want to do God's will, and serve Him, and keep the commandments, etc. and it is great! But what is something that Bryndi Cloward wants/desire with all her heart because of who she is? Because of your individuality as a unique daughter of God? [Have] you done a list of those things? Either Spiritual, temporal, educational, understanding or anything YOU would have in your heart? 
 I know they were getting at my goals and what I was hoping to achieve in life. Good question as if I do live to 90 again a 1/3 of my mortal life has been lived. I laid in bed and thought of my priorities. Thought of what "moves" me. What excites me and what I live for... after a full day of reflection and reviewing my priorities sometimes with deep tears, and truly seeking what is in my heart--my "greatest desire"...



   My friend's timely email caused me great reflection all today as I pondered who and what I am today and who I want to become... and everything I strive to do (okay not everything, because I sure fall short and forget at times, like always remember Christ and praying with real intent etc) revolves around a deep motivation, a deep desire.
   My greatest desire is to become like Christ. To become the daughter of God that Heavenly Father wants me to be. This package includes all that I do and take in or choose to do with my time is uplifting and or edifying. That I will be able to use it (whatever I am focusing on) as a tool in some why to bless any that God would place on my path. I have a driving force that I want to be and do it for God--but I also almost in 2nd place want to do it for my brothers and sisters. I want to bless, uplift, lighten, care for, love, show kindness, awaken, support, serve, fellowship, hug, all and any placed on my path. And my hopes, in doing any of these things, will lead them to the very joys and happiness I live by... lead them to Christ, all that He is, can do, will do, does do for one who will come and follow Him.
   I shared with Dad in some reflective tears tonight, that what I do is not very "measurable" in terms of the world. Only God fully knows the intents and desires of my heart. Yes it is to do His will and to keep His commandments--but why? I have choice. I know I could choose differently. But wanting to be like Him/for Him, help bring anyone to Him, is in me. It is who I am. It is where I choose to spend my energy and focus. And because of that, my goals in life focus on achieving those desires.
   So what will the next 30 years bring, if I am allowed to live them, I hope to become more of who He would have me be. Have more charity, more quickness to forgive, no desires to judge wrongly when judgment is needed, constant desires to live the gospel and keep commandments. And by studying and striving to become who I want to become, I hope in another 30 years I will be one step closer.
   I don't know why I am writing any of this. Sometimes I would choose to keep this way more private for fear that I am labled as "perfect" that all I do is inspired... like I said, God knows my imperfections and the things I am striving to become.
   I am a 30 old virgin, who LOVES and believes in the chastity of women. I know that Man and Woman are to be lawfully wedded and only then, can fully enjoy the beauty of sanctifying processes of their souls becoming one with God. I am a 30 year old that is choosing Christ. I am a 30 year old that longs for a family and to spoil a husband with support and love as He fulfills His priesthood duties, but I am also a 30 year old who is striving to live by the council of "all is well" in every given moment. I am a 30 year old who knows how to pray and knows that God does answer prayers. I am a 30 year old woman that knows who she is, where she came from before this earth life, why she is here now, and where she can go if she lives God's plan--after this life. I am a 30 year old woman who knows the value of family.
   So "cheers" to another 30 years, if God allows! Whether here or there--my greatest desire is to become like Christ.

I am grateful for handsome nephews on my door step who exclaim,
"Wow, I like your hair!" as the first words of "hello"
out of their mouth! :)
Pie Eating Contest--Grandpa won! :D

**I am grateful for teenage nephews! I LOVE THEM MORE THAN THEY KNOW! 

Friday, November 23, 2012

THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN SATAN'S PLAN...



A few weeks back I had the opportunity to go to a fireside in American Fork. I felt impressed I needed to go... and when I walked in the building I chuckled at the mess up because apparently it was for "grey/silver" haired singles. I was late, and when I sat down, I felt like a baby and somewhat out of place. But the spirit was there and I felt impressed to stay.
   The title of the fireside was "Living as a Christian in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia". Brother and Sister Vera were the speakers and they shared their experience of living there for five years. I only caught the last 30 mins of the fireside, but I was deeply moved.
    Brother and Sister Vera shared their experience with the church. There are many people who want nothing to do with Christianity. Spies, police, neighbors that will turn in neighbors. They had to be very careful about everything they said and did in Saudi Arabia.
   With the church, they did not keep any written records. If they had to write down someone's name/list, it was all done in code and people's names/family names/rolls etc were done with initials only.
   Before he and his wife would go to church they would look outside and try to make sure they were not being followed. Sister Vera's daily conversations with her 2 and I believe 4 year olds was teaching them that although they loved Jesus even if their friends asked them what they did on Sunday, they could never say His name out loud or tell any of their friends about church and what they learned/did. This comment alone seemed crazy! But the more I heard of what they had to do living in a non-freedom of religion area... my thoughts were so full.
   Brother Vera also shared that many of his co-workers were good Muslims who sought to do right things. Accustom to their religion his Muslim friends were to pray five times a day. On a particular outing with a co-worker (I believe it was the noon) prayers came up. His friend told Bro Vera to just drive quickly to work where he could go and partake of the prayer. Normaly everyone is to stop and go to specified areas for prayer.
   As they rounded the corner in their car, the Prayer Police (yes you read that right) made them stop their car and motioned for them to show their identification cards. These are cards that let the police know if one is muslin/citizen or not. Brother Vera showed his card and was "okay" because he was a foreigner. But when his co-worker showed his card and that he was Muslim/thus not praying when he was suppose to-- the police took him right there on the spot and put him in jail for 24 hours. At this point in the story Brother Vera shared how if Satan would have had His way in the pre-exsistance--that would be exactly how his plan would have been. Go to jail if not found doing the exact thing you were commanded to do.
   The more Brother and Sister Vera shared, the more my heart swelled for the country that I live in. For the freedoms sought and fought for--based on religious freedom!!
    When Bro. Vera came back to the states, just after a short while he was in Home Depot and heard a man discussing on his cell phone about, "...we will meet up for Elders Quorum and do church...". Without thinking Brother Vera lunged for the guy's phone and was ready to knock it to the floor while asking the man if he was crazy saying such things out loud. Right before he actually grabbed the phone, he finally remembered that he was in America and it was okay to "speak" openly about religeous things.  Sister Vera's daughter came and quietly pulled her aside and whispered if it would be okay to talk about Jesus with her cousin. Sister Vera then shared that because they were in America now, she could talk openly about Jesus all the time!
   Brother and Sister Vera then testified of the freedoms we so readily take forgranted here... in a country that was fought for on the ground of/for religious freedom! I left the meeting with deep gratitude for this country. And also a little remorse at my own lack of gratitude/what I take for granted so often. Since the fireside I have listened to how many times I have had a religious any type of talk in the open... I was out to lunch with one of my old young woman at Subway and our conversation was quite divine. The spirit rushed about us as we both shared our thoughts about God and what he had done for each of us in the last three years. As we shared I couldn't help but look around the resterant and all the customers coming in and out who might happen to hear our conversation. I thought about how I would see no police shipping me off to jail... what freedoms I take for granted.
    I LOVE the picture of George Washington kneeling down. As a curtisy of mom and dad needing a wall for it to hang on--this picture resides in my bedroom. As I took this shot, I found it profound that in the reflection of the glass--the pool of bethesda with the Savior is shown in the exact place George Washington is kneeling down to! And reflecting on his back is the picture of the 2nd coming.
   Our founding fathers were men of great faith and devotion to the most High God. They fought for the cause that I so easily take for granted... freedom of religion and freedom to live my life the way I feel best. Amen to some of the best blood shed, such a high price given, so I can talk about Jesus Christ, church, the Holy Ghost-- openly. No one takes me to jail when I am not caught saying a prayer when I should have/should be. Oh the merciful plan of our great God! In providing a nation where we have freedom of religion and speech.

The title of liberty:
In memory of our God, 
our religion, 
and freedom, 
and our peace, 
our wives, 
and our children... (Alma 46:12)
 This is America to me! Oh so much to be thankful for. Bless thanksgiving and the reason why we celebrate!

I am grateful for Heavenly Father's Great plan of happiness which allows
 me the opportunity to choose to follow Him and His
perfect plan for me... a plan that included a
Savior, an atonement, repentance, grace,
forgiveness love and redemption.

God bless/ed America! 

Sunday, November 18, 2012

"...SHE FOUND IT WITHIN"

   So this is a follow up from the 1 a.m. coin and wilted celery post.
   My mom just sent me her impression... It is deep! And when I had a real moment to read her thought if you would have been a fly on my wall you would have heard me verbally say... "Whoa..!" (and yes, I am the only one here at the moment. :))
"As I was reading your lost coin analogy I had an insight. She lit the light (I assume prayed to get the light) to see/recognize it. She swept (as you said to get rid of or gave up her stuff) and then found her coin (that which was of great worth) in her house. She discovered it was in her house (her inner vessel that is housed w/in her mortal body) the God or light of Christ within her." --Judy Cloward (emphasis added by me and small tweaking from iphone text.)
Shut the front door! Intense! IF WE OURSELVES ARE LOST-- we hold up Christ and sweep out / search within ourselves until we find the "God" "Light of Christ" within us.... we search until we are found!!

Who would have thought the lost silver coin was/is/can be a story about being lost yourself... Oh love you Mom! Deep!

I LOVE Sundays!!!!!!!!!!

I am grateful for parents/Mothers/Fathers who know!

THE LOST COIN AND WILTED CELERY

   A few weeks back I had a profound night at institute. I seriously can't say if I have ever looked forward to a class as much as I have this one. My teacher--MY IDOL! Seriously, if I wanted to have a mortal role model after how I would like to be as a gospel teacher, it would be after her.
   We were discussing the "lost" parables...we talked about the lost sheep, coin and prodigal son. Sister Petersen asked a girl in the class to summarize the lost coin. She brought up the point that the candle was lit and then the woman searched the whole house until she found the coin.
...what woman having ten pieces of silver, if she lose one apiece, doth not light a candle, and sweep the house, and seek diligently till she find it? 
And when she hath found it, she calleth her friends and her neighbours together, saying, Rejoice with me; for I have found the piece which I had lost.
   My mind raced with the symbolism. She found/held up "Christ"! He is the light of the world. A light that shines forth in darkness. When her coin, "valuable" was lost, she lit a candle and swept "searched" the house seeking diligently until she found it.
  What was it about the "light" that allowed her to find the coin?
  Rudimentary, but stay with me here. The silver coin... made out of metal. Of it's own, cannot do produce it's own light. However you let light pass over a metal coin, and you will have a reflection! The light, surely bounced off the metal "causing the "light" from the metal to reflect. In a sense reflect back the "light of Christ" /gospel, worth in the coin. To hold up Christ's light so what is in others, even if they are lost, shines... that is how we can find them, when our attention catches the light - "the child of God" that is in them.
   Powerful, deep impression.

   I love celery, however I don't blame people who hate the veggie for if they ever bit into a bitter celery, like anything rotten, the experience is not necessarily a pleasant one.
   Dad taught me a great lesson on how to "freshen" up wilted Celery... which can also help with the bitterness and preserve the life of celery.
   So here is the secret. Notice the first picture of meet Mr. Wilted Celery Stalk.  Cut off the ends, add some water and at the end of the day the picture on the right is litterally what my stalk looked like after sitting in water.
Morning-- wilted, floppy celery.
Evening, completely crisp, happy, strong celery!
























Isn't this just another testimony of my life?!!! When I cut off dead ends [less than worthy habits, pride, envy, lack of love, selfishness], and soak into The Living Water [remembering Christ, scripture study, purpose-full inspired prayers], my whole life/soul perks up!


   As a sweetness note, I put together an old RS presidency dinner. Maria and Meg both have two kids now and Citlalli and I wanted to meet the clan! I still am filled with great emotion when I think that the Lord let me serve with such choice women. Women who are now raising their children to God. How I love these woman! How I still cherish the time we were able to serve, unified, together.
   Life is full of choice moments. Moments to love, to be kind, to lift heavy hearts, to be an example, to hold up Light. God is constantly placing such moments in my life. I listened to a devotional.... We are, I AM, that I might have joy! Not just after this life, but here, and now.
   Sometimes my joy is consuming. 

Jesus is the Christ!

I am so grateful all things testify of Christ!
Even wilted celery, and lost metal coins.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

COUNT THEM 5 BY 5...!

Want to join me?!

This idea came to my mind last night and I am starting today!



 In honor of the challenge, you may want to humm along with me...

Hymn 241
Count Your Blessings

1. When upon life’s billows you are tempest-tossed,
When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,
Count your many blessings; name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord has done.

[Chorus]
Count your blessings;
Name them one by one.
Count your blessings;
See what God hath done.
Count your blessings;
Name them one by one.
Count your many blessings;
See what God hath done.

2. Are you ever burdened with a load of care?
Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
Count your many blessings; ev’ry doubt will fly,
And you will be singing as the days go by.

3. When you look at others with their lands and gold,
Think that Christ has promised you his wealth untold.
Count your many blessings; money cannot buy
Your reward in heaven nor your home on high.

4. So amid the conflict, whether great or small,
Do not be discouraged; God is over all.
Count your many blessings; angels will attend,
Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end.

Depending on what fills my list, I do plan, come Dec, to post my list of 150.
What if you miss a day? Just pick it up and start on that day! 




I loved Wilford Woodruff's profound statement. I can't remember if I ever posted it, but it is something I am trying to live by....

And on a personal note, Happy November! November 1st is very sacred to me. It is among the choicest of all days in the year! Happy November!


I am grateful for a mission call that required me to
take out my endowments.

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

HOW TO PRAY?


Have you ever asked any of these questions before:
  • How do I pray?
  • Who am I praying to?
  • Why is it a commandment to pray?
  • I feel silly... like my prayer is just bouncing off the wall... is anyone listening?
  • When should I prayer? 
  • What should I pray for? 
  • Can praying really change my life, let alone just make a difference?
  • How do I know when I get an answer?
   I have asked all these questions before. It started with a strong desire of wanting to know if Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ really live. IF they live, I was determined to give them my life. But if they didn't--well I guess no one had to know that I had been seeking in private. I was tempted to feel silly at times... always grateful that when I was "trying" prayers that no one else knew what I was doing. There were prayers out of habit, prayers that were not sincere and just going through the motion. Some prayers were filled with anger longing to just know for myself and some prayers were filled with wondering tears. My journey seemed to never have a middle for I felt often I was always right at the beginning--which felt like I was nowhere/wasting my time. Oh there is a beautiful Ether 12 which states at least seven times that it is AFTER the trial of one's faith, the miracles/witness come.
   I prayed in secret for almost a year to know if Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ live. I hoped that they did. I believed they might. But I wanted to know for myself. And that journey started my own trial of faith and also putting prayer to the test.
   This article (CLICK HERE) is awesome! And the five simple principles stated, I have found true for myself. How do I know they work--because every single one of the principles I have tested with my own prayers.
   Persitance is the key.
   Kneel down, bow the head, and open with your thoughts to Heavenly Father. Kneeling and bowing is a form of respect. I have found for myself that casually laying in bed and repeating words before I drift in and out of sleep has WAY LESS impact than when I show respect and reverence of actually kneeling and bowing my head.
   And boy do I have a testimony of the power of praying out loud. Even when I go on business trips and share a hotel room with a co-worker, I sneak away into the bathroom, turn on the fan and kneel down and vocally whisper out my prayer. (AND if you have a little ADD like my brain tends to have when needing to focus at time, praying out loud helps me focus on the words I am saying. Again, the article is dead on with all true principles I have applied to my prayers.)
    I was taught once the value of being completely honest with God when praying. So when I first was "testing" the waters of prayer I told God that I felt silly and as if I was speaking to the room and because I did not know He was there, how would I know If and when He did answered me... thank goodness I did not stop trying just because at first I was uncomfortable with all I didn't know. **And this is not to say I know everything. I DON'T! So much more to learn, but the truths I have learned and applied--LIFE CHANGING in the world of my prayers.
    God already has blessings that He has ready to give us, but receiving those blessings are conditional upon us asking for them (see bible dictionary prayer).
   I found that I could pray anytime anywhere. And the things I should pray for, were and are ever evolving. I have learned, not fully in depth, but scratching the surface of the power of asking. Heavenly Father won't force me to learn His ways or seek blessings. So it takes my agency in asking to know and find things out on myself.
   Can praying really make a difference/change my life? I have journals and pages and pages of the difference it has made in my life.... just type in the search engine at the top of the page on the right the word "prayer" and just see how many posts come up. Careful, reading them all might take you a week!
   See I never prayed to see God or Jesus Christ. I simply asked that I could be blessed with something I could not deny. I wanted to know that I knew they lived. Not because others claimed it, I want to know for myself. And if God was my Father, then wouldn't He want me to know for myself...  
   I received my answer! It didn't happen the way I thought it would, I didn't see anything or have angels sore around me--but I felt words impressed upon my mind in such a way that my prayer was answered! I KNEW/KNOW Jesus Christ is the Savior and Heavenly Father lives/is my Father. And it is not some special club membership or holding one's breath a certain way. You can know for yourself completely and fully without question! I guess the real question is how bad do you want to know? Enough that you will devote time and energy until you get an answer?
   How grateful I am for a God that never gave up on my stubborn self.

Basics with prayer:
  • Address God: Dear Heavenly Father, Dear God
  • Thank Him for any/all things. Some days when it is really bad, I sometimes have to ponder over what I am thankful for, and there have been days where all I could come up was I was thankful my knees still worked so I could kneel. And on better days, the tears of gratitude flow freely.
  • Ask Him for the things you stand in need of. Don't fall for the deception that "your" askings are not as important as "big" things. Or the trap of thinking that there is so much going on in others lives--that you don't want to bother/waste God's times with your items... If you have ever thought those things, pat yourself on the back! Join the club of "You have been deceived/tricked by the Devil" Club. Believe me, I sometimes know that club all a little too personal. But seriously, stop and think for a min. If you are a parent, and your child asks something of you, do you throw up your hands and storm off? I know, rediuolous, but so is the thought that one doesn't want to "bother" / trouble the Lord when there are so many more imporant things. 
 Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:

 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.

  Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone?

  Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent?

  If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?  (Matt 7)
  • (Sorry no bullet should be here but I can't seem to make the coding go away.) Seriously, and again, the logic is like getting your arm cut off and saying, "I am not going to bother the doctor because there are more important matters like that guys missing tounge." (Silly, yes, but honestly it is silly to be tempted into thinking we don't want to trouble/bother the Lord. So if any of those thoughts arise, I am telling you they are not inspired thoughts--squish them like the nasty mosquitos they are! For such thoughts are to stop you from seeking God/coming unto Him therefor the Club captain, Satan Himself, pins another Gold star to His forehead of getting you to stop your attempt at drawing close to the Lord.) We can ask and should pray over all and any things! God wants us to!
  • We can pray for others. I personally know I have been sustained by the specific prayers of others. How humbling to know that my name made it into their sacred communion time with Heavenly Father. Humbling, beauitful, I will take it, blessing!
  • When ending your prayer simply close it "in the name of Jesus Christ, amen". It is all because of Christ that we can pray to the Father.
   How does one know they they are receiving revelation/an answer to prayer? Here are a few of my favorite articles.
   Holy cow those are all good and have taught me much about prayer and personal revelation. But when it is all said and done, even if you have no more then a desire TO BELIEVE... let that desire work within you (see Alma). I was skeptical of receiving revelation at times and far too often went through the motion of praying and not putting anything personal into it... BUT I KNOW FOR MYSELF that GOD ANSWERS PRAYERS. HE HEARS US. HE LOVES US. HE WILL LEAD US. IF WE ARE PERSISTENT WITH HUMILITY HE WILL TEACH US HOW TO PRAY, HOW TO RECEIVE ANSWERS TO PRAYER, HOW TO HAVE OUR WORDS PENETRATE THE HEAVENS AND NOT JUST BOUNCE OFF OUR BEDS.
   No, I am not screaming, just very intensely testifying that if this post is for you and you doubt how to pray or if God really hears you, or if your prayers really do make a difference in your life/the lives of those you love--I am hear to tell you they do.! He does! They will/are!
 
Enter the world of prayer at your own risk! :) 

   For surely you are in store for quite a ride. There is no limit to the prayers that can be offered, words can be inspired to where we pray for the very things the Father would have us pray for. Prayer can change your life and the lives of those whom you love and have stewardship over. Do you have faith enough to test it? Are you willing to consistently put in the work of striving to say sincere prayers? Do you want it bad enough?
   Even if you only have the desire TO believe... let that desire work within you.

   GOD ANSWERS PRAYERS. You are not alone. You can pray for help and strength to be able to pray! So ironic how the whole system works... but work it does! 

Life changing--yes!
Easy to become complacent--yes!
But easier to start back the habit of sincere, heart felt prayer. What is the condition of your heart? Where is your treasure/brain as you prayer? GOD ANSWERS PRAYERS! Are you willing to work for such a knowledge--because yes work in the form of your faith, constancy, and HOPE that God WILL answer your prayers=required. My personal study of the scriptures, particularly The Book of Mormon, opened my mind to new, exciting possibilities. God is not a respecter of persons. So what He will do for one, if it is not against His will, He will do for others/ME!

Even if you have no more than just a desire to believe what has been written, let that desire work within you. TEST GOD! PROVE HIM! TRY! **and advice--be ever ready with a note pad and pen that works. When God answers your prayer, (His timing, His way) writing it down will not only help you remember what was given, but at least in my life, it is like God notices that and says, "Bryndi, that was important enough to write down... well here let me poor out some more important thoughts!" Power in writing. Again the awesomeness articles are sooo true! TRIED TESTED IN MY OWN LIFE!
   I am a witness that no matter who you are, what you have done or should have done--does not put an X on your life being filled with revelation and personal blessings from Heavenly Father because there is repentance and forgiveness, cleansing through the blood of the Lamb. His Son is the Master healer. He can and will heal all that is broken... if we will simply come unto Him, ask and plead, trust and serve. Prayers are powerful... I promise you can know it for yourself! And when you realize it for the first time, I would love to know!

Happy Praying!!

I am grateful for Christmas music on Pandora in the Octobers of my life!

Saturday, October 27, 2012

WHICH IS BETTER, SUNRISE OR SUNSET? MAGIC HAPPENS IN THE MORNING!



   Today was Andrea's sister Kira's funeral. Andrea (left) loved her sister Kira. I had the blessing of meeting Kira several times. Huge smile, larger than life smile in fact!
   Sweet Kira has been battling cancer and was relieved of her physical body ailments this past Monday morning. She was just 33.
   Her funeral was simply beauitful, the spirit was overwhelming.
   Andrea's brother shared the scripture of how we love Christ because He first loved us and how he felt that people loved Kira because she first loved them. Can one leave this mortal life with a higher complement than of that?!
   Two things that Andrea shared about Kira really touched me. Andrea asked Kira which was better, sunrise or sunset. Andrea shared how of course a sunset was better with all the colors that go with it--and how sunsets certainly trump. Kira wisely stated that a Sunrise was her favorite... because it takes more effort to enjoy it. What a true statement!

   I pondered over my "sunrise" moments... and was sweetly reminded what each moment meant for/to me.
 Here are just a few that have been tender to me. 

 Mexico--a sunrise with just me and what sounded like 100's of birds signing crazily in the trees.  It was unlike any moment I have ever had with birds in the morning. It was wonderful!

 Sitting on the pier all by myself with my scriptures in hand. I had opened right to the spot in The Book of Mormon and read earlier that God was aware of all of His people in whatever land they may be in. At the time I was out of the country and feeling quite alone... but the scripture brought tears to my eyes. God knew exactly where I was, and was mindful of me.


 A moment when on a morning walk when I had the reassurance that God's plan would still unfold in my life, despite all my imperfections and weaknesses.



Notice the mountains. The whole valley was covered in shadows but as the sun came out the distant mountain peaks danced in sunlight, lifting the mists of darkness (literally) from the morning. You can see how the sun is just starting to touch the peak in the right mountain in this picture. Steam was arising from from the reflection pool.... And I watched as the valley fully became flooded with sunlight.


This wasn't the morning that it happened, but it is a morning that is symbolic of what I prayed for. In learning to Jog, God sent me a morning dense ground fog. I could see only 10 feet in front of me but when I looked directly up I could see the sky and stars. God sent that type of day to me two days in a row. As a result I was able to distract myself because I could not see the distance and keep jogging just 10 feet at a time... which resulted in 20 mins of jogging which in 6 weeks of working at it, I had not been able to do yet. Miracle!



A sunrise in WY with Chick and Mia along the river front. It was magical and I loved the time being with my sister. I walked in awh and gratitude at the friendship the Lord allowed Nyk and I to have. One that we both worked to have, and cherish what we now have.


 Cold sunrise in Scolfield, but I had enough stamina to get up the big hills around mom and dad's place. That was a miracle in itself.


 Sunrise, on a swing, reading about the Savior. Just me, the birds, and the light.


 Thayne and I took a red-eye to Florida to meet up with mom and dad. This morning flight was the result of the first part of this (click here) old blog post. After that conversation, and I believe a change in planes, this was the first view of the sunrise above the clouds.


 And just a few weeks ago at mom and dad's place...
I bundled up in the very, very cold morning. I went out before the sun had risen. I was trying to study, but was distracted by the awh with how the morning light was intensifying the golden leaves. I noted dense frost on the top of the cabin, and smiled at how the frost melted away with the morning light .... causing an awesome amount of dripping to occure.

I pondered and was reminded how sometimes I let parts of my life become cold and frost "bitten"... and how all I need is the "Son'slight = SONrise, to melt away anything that I have allowed to become cold or "hard" in my life... in my heart.

   All different mornings, but each symbolic and/or filled with moments of quite, pondering. I too, love sunrises!

   Andrea shared a little of how Kira's personality was. They both lived together up in an apartment in SLC. She said there were bushes outside their apartment windows and some annoying bird would be doing it's thing early in the morning. Andrea did not vocalize her annoyance with the bird but became more and more annoyed at it.

   One time when the two of them were visiting with their parents, they were asked how their mornings were at their apartment. Before Andrea could answer--Kira piped up that they had bushes right outside their windows and every morning she loved to hear the song of a particular bird that lived there. Andrea thought no way could this be the same bird! But sure enough it was. :)
   How can something be so annoying to one and so joyous to another--and be the exact same thing?! PERSPECTIVE!!! Guess that is how the gospel is. Glass half full, or half empty. Church a time to worship God, or a three hour block to survive.

   I left the funeral deeply inspired and determined to live my life more fully. To live/work for the sunrises of my life and not just the sunsets. And to be decidedly positive rather than annoyed. Thank you Kira Staiger for your beautiful legacy! You truly loved God and lived a life centered in your testimony of Jesus Christ. I am so thankful for the knowledge that because of Jesus Christ, this life is not the end to our existence. Families can be together forever, through Heavenly Father's plan! Thank you Andrea for loving your sister so deeply! Her legacy will live on! Listen for those morning birds. Surely they will sing a sing just for you, from her.
  
For so many personal reasons, I am grateful
God allows us to experience things (even if hard) that remind us
just how good/just/loving He is and just how
perfect His plans/ways are for me.

My I live to serve Him.

Jesus is the Christ.

Friday, October 19, 2012

AFTER THE MANNER OF HAPPINESS...




Some thoughts on my heart this week...
  • I have a co-worker who is gracious, yet confident. Love the example she sets!
  • I am still attracted / drawn to kindness. I hope I can apply / live the virtue of kindness better in my life.
  • I like being able to sing the song of redeeming love, I have missed the time when I have not / could not.
  • The piano moves me. I am so thankful for friends who borrow my piano to practice--meanwhile filling my home with the sweetest spirit. (click here)
  • I watched this (click here thanks Kat for posting) and sat in reverent awh of this woman. When I finished watching it I desired to be better about shaving off anything that is not worthy of my time, my efforts, or my focus. I often think about the quote below... it is a reminder to me that I better be about what the Lord wants me to be about. Even if I feel I am choosing good things to do--I am to council with Him in all my doings... that He may direct me for good (Alma 37:37). It's easy to be "doing". But what doings am I doing? Are they for Him, approved by Him?
       "It wasn’t long before we realized that there were a lot of things a stake presidency could do—so many, in fact, that if we didn’t set inspired priorities, we might miss doing the important ones. Competing priorities began to arise, deflecting our focus from the vision shared by the Brethren. There were many “good” things to do, but not all of them mattered most.   
       "We learned an important lesson: the fact that something is good is not always reason enough to require our time and resources." --President Dieter F. Uchtdorf 
  • I "happened" to come across my friend's inspiring journey of faith, how to use it, and how she applied it in her life to obtain a dream she had. Her applications of faith, and her bluntness / straight forward directness of how truly it works = BEAUTIFUL! Time reading, well invested. Thank you Mel. (click here for Faith and Pianos and just treat yourself to two of Mel's drawing posts. They gave me a fun chuckle! I sooo relate with the ipad, I LOVE mine too! Laugh with Mel's drawings on Pregnancy and the Demise of Veganism click here, and ipad love click here.)
  • Tonight I studied "How to Survive in Enemy Territory" --President Packer's address in the Oct Ensign... EPIC talk! Mine is completely highlighted/marked up! Worthy of your time read! (Click here). 
"Discovering how the Holy Ghost operates in your life is the quest of a lifetime. Once you have made that discovery for yourself, you can live in enemy territory and will not be deceived or destroyed."--President Packer.
  • A kid in institute made the comment about why he thought that the sacrament prayers tell us to always remember Christ. There is power in remembering. He shared that even when his days are filled with scripture study and temple attendance, which are good things, his life takes on a higher level of power and strength/peace when he actually strives to remember / think literally of Christ through out his day. I was inspired by his observation. I am striving to live the true principle he shared. 
  • Sister Petersen my, New Testament teacher, shared that it is better to have a positive thought than a negative though. Well said! 
  • A friend shared their thoughts on how it is okay to fail and to discover that you aren't the greatest / best at something or perhaps your efforts, even well intended, were / end up being a flop. Can there be any true success without the pains of trial and error?! Great truth. We are to never give up! Discouragement is a tool of the Devil. And how about the fear OF failing / not succeeding... fear immobilizes us. Satan's a clever one. Jesus Christ however, TRUMPS all aspects. The Savior can calm our fear, if we let Him. He can cause faith to replace doubt and to strengthen one / give power / courage to seize the day, finish the task, to keep walking the path that is unclear.
  • I am finding the power and truth of Elder Christofferson's Daily Bread talk... (click here). I am being taught the power of pleading for the "bread" I need for the day. Never mind about tomorrow, there is enough evil in that all ready, but there is power in pleading and asking for what will sustain me just today.
  • I have a testimony of the beauty, peace and freedom of fighting / living the battle of overcoming the natural man.
  • What comes out of the mouth truly defiles the man. (Matt 15:18) May my insides be worthy of coming outside.
Conclusion: Or rather another beginning. Here's to another day of pleading for the Lord for the daily bread I need.... in doing so, I have been strengthened against the fiery ever so tempting ugly darts of the adversary. Here's to the woman who is my role model in quiet, yet powerful confidence. Here's to kindness in His redeeming love. Here's to pianos being obtained and played, faith exercised, and reminders/skills on How TO SURVIVE in Enemy Territory. Here's to the kid who opened his mouth about his thoughts on the Savior. I want to be like Jesus.

Be of good cheer.
The future is as bright as your faith. 
:)
--President Monson

I am grateful for goodly parents.
I love you mom and dad.

Sunday, October 14, 2012

PRAYERS, MISTAKES, AND MIRACLES

Thanks Hill for the soft "kick" that it has almost been a month without posting...! :) I love you.

Many miracles, and moments of deep gratitude. God has been so kind even when not deserving. Doesn't the scriptures say that even "...if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants." So we are never really deserving, but yet because we are His, and He loves us... He deemed us deserving of the sacrifice of His only begotten, perfect son... So undeserving, and yet He desires us to partake of all that He has...

HM REUNION--ZERMATT
Our big annual Reunion for work came and went. Too many miracles to count, but I will share just two very personal ones. With only one Saturday before the event, I literally had a window of 40 mins to go shopping for the banquet night. I had not put off shopping for a gown, just really didn't have any time to spare/put towards shoppping. (And yes it doesn't help that I really dislike shopping or anything like it.) I had put in my heart and mind faith that God would help me get something with no time and no extra money set aside in my budget.
   As I finished up work that Saturday, I said a quick prayer sharing my delemha of time and funds with the Lord. I felt impressed to head over to Dillards. Now I had been there a few weeks prior but was in a hurry, and did not see anything.
I pulled into Dillards a little frantic knowing I only had time for one store. In I went and after 15 mins found a wrap around top for 40 bucks that I was not thrilled about but at least I could throw on a skirt and call it good. Just as I was walking back to the dressing room, my eye caught a zebra print. ME- Zebra print...yes, that is kind of a joke. And it was another joke that I was shopping back in the section where I used to shop when I was 100 pounds heavier. But here was this (I call it a tent) type blouse. HUGE in size, but to my mind was brought a vision of how I could make it work. I grabbed the shirt and went into the dressing room. Sure enough, this $22 wonder would work just fine! 5 mins found me with a fancy pin to tack under my bust line to hold the whole "tent" together... and wallah! In 20 mins I had my banquet get up, modest and somewhat cheap. God is sure good!
   The following Wed had us setting up our event. Look how cool my designer is! Not to mention how great Zermatt was for letting us deck out their bear. Here is the before and after shot of Marin Barny's genus. You can't tell but this bear even has sparkly eyelashes! What a sight to be hold! Heritage Makers book loving consultant blinded out bear TRUMPS plain old accordion playing boring statute bear! ;)
   Wed setup came together pretty smoothly. My team and I were all exhausted by the end of the night but thankfully we always can count on event adrenalin to kick in!
  Thursday morning and afternoon had me running around coordinating the different meetings and events. I came out to our registration desk at 4:40pm only to find that I had made a HUGE mistake. I didn't order enough of the registration shirts. (Everyone who comes to the three day event, receives a registration gift of a pen, booklet, charm, bag and a tshirt.)
   How many events do I do a year!? And how many years have I been about this? A mistake like that could be easy for a rookie planner, and although I am no Patti yet, I surely am not a newbie either. And Yes it is "just" a tshirt, but a tshirt that teams plan an evening around wearing so they can do team pictures... and it is never fun being "left out" so the pressure was on. How do I fix this awesome challenge. The truth was... I couldn't.
   I ran and called my vendor and without trying to freak out asked him if he could some how get me 40 more shirts. Now the logistics of this little nightmare were quite amazing. Steve, my awesome shirt vendor, said that he would call and see if any warehouses had stock. The plan was he would call and I would start counting up exactly how many of each size I was in need of. I frantically counted with my ever willing and beyond patient/forgiving team. I called Steve back at almost 7 mins to 5 to give him my numbers. He said that the warehouses he was calling didn't seem to have any stock in med shirts--which med shirts was the most quantity of shirt I was in need of.
    I ended the phone call with Steve knowing that I had just requested the impossible. Here it was practically 5pm. I was asking that one of his vendors overnight the shirts to him to get there by the next morning, so his team could re-screen and print and have them to me no later than Saturday morning. *Reminder this was Thursday night. The impossible. Heavy hearted and sick over my mistake I went into one of the restrooms and locked myself in the handicap stall. I knelt down. I told the Lord that it was all my fault. Truly, it was a complete error on my part. I just simply had not ordered enough shirts. I asked the Lord that if there was a way to get the shirts to Steve--that he might be inspired what warehouses to call and those who had not closed their shipping for the day. ...  I still don't know how I made such a mistake, but I did. I prepared my heart for the worst and got up off the restroom floor and headed out to my next meeting which was to do a team picture in our awesome photobooth before heading to our opening session.
   I was getting ready to jump into a photobooth at about 5:20pm. I had not heard back from Steve so I figured the shirts were a no go.
  As I got into the photobooth to take these pictures with my team, my phone rang.

"Bryndi, it's Steve. I found a warehouse. They are overtightened the shirts tonight. I will receive them in the morning. We will print them and have them ready for pick up by tomorrow afternoon. I have to go, talk to you tomorrow." I wanted to start crying right there. I thanked Steve and told him he was an answer to prayer. And Steve (who knows how this impossible thing just happened) became quite and said basically that this could only have happened because of God. Steve acknowledged the impossible becoming possible. My sweet parents stopped by Steve's warehouse and in less than 24 hours--I had enough tshirts to fill the registration needs!
   Why did God have to save my hide? Really He didn't have to. There is truly no blame for the situation but my own mistake. No one else... and yet God pulled out all the stops! The tears flowed freely that night as I knelt in gratitude for God's kindness and mercy.
   Once the whole event was over, I spent a day fasting in gratitude, crying and taking time in the temple. Truly, the Lord got me through the event. He always does. And I know He always will, but there is always this deep satisfaction/gratitude for when such events are finished. God is such a God of mercy.

GOD, PLEASE FIX MY MISTAKE OR MAKE IT OKAY
I had a dear friend teach me a valuable lesson. She had a project coming up that required travel time for her co-workers. Without praying about it she asked one of the folks on her team to go. But after offering the spot she prayed about what she should have done and she felt that she had made a mistake. That the one she was asking to go was not the one to go. My beautiful friend's next action was what was so stunning to me. She went back to God and said she had made a mistake and that now He was going to have to either fix it and get the right person to go on the task, or make the one she had offered to go, be able to go/work out.
   The next day, the person she had offered to have help with the task came back to her and said she felt impressed she was not to accept. THUS, my friend could go back and follow through with what she felt impressed to do with her prayer.
   No stewing, or beating her self up over her mistake. She simply acknowledged she had made a mistake (not on purpose but a lesson learned that she should have prayed first before just extending) and exercised her agency to have faith that God would either correct the mistake or make the person selected to work out. What incredible faith! What a beautiful testimony and reminder. Thou shalt not make a mistake was never a thou shalt... So even when we make those mistakes, God, who loves perfectly, does not with hold his love from us. The deliverer is in the house! **This doesn't mean that we will be delivered right away. My friend's faith was that God would either get the right person to do the task, or He would work with the one originally assigned.Great lesson! And what a difference in when I made the shirt mistake and tried to not let my guilt consume me. My friend's simple, but defiant faith was that she had made a mistake, learned her lesson, trusted that God would work with her mistake or make it work out the way He wanted it to.... and He did!

INSTITUTE--FREEDOM!
So at the beginning of the semester I felt impressed I needed to attend a certain class at institute. The topic was applicable and I anticipated all I would learn...however my love for Wed night institute turned into drudgery. Although I loved my teacher, I was not loving their teaching style. :/
   When it involves others, I am a commitment girl. I am not just going to drop a class because I was not "feeling it". Plus, I wasn't putting it all on the teacher. Hadn't I preached enough about how if one is not getting something out of the meeting, then one is not going prepared. ... But week after week I started dreading going to institute.
   After a month into the new semester, my girlfriend's work schedule opened up and she asked if she could start going to institute with me. I figure she would attend the class I was attending and I almost wanted to suggest to her that she should go to a different class, but I didn't for some reason. ??
   Finally my soul seemed to not take it any more. I prayed about skipping the class and joining another. I worried about my girlfriend and having her follow what I felt was like being a horrible example. I also felt bad for the teacher whom I do love and I know they love me--but I just felt like I was wasting my time. Trying to swallow down the guilt, I told my teacher that I needed to go to the other class room. My friend, thankfully stayed in the class. Her not "flowing" me to my new class helped me feel that at least I didn't set an example she would follow.
   Within 10 mins of the new class, I was LOVING institute life again. The room was filled with the sweetest spirit. My teacher is a convert from England and has a passion for the gospel. It was night and day difference to my soul. I felt the whole evening I was on cloud nine! I then worried that when I told my friend how amazing my new class was, she would jump ships too, and I didn't want to do this to the other teacher.
   Well after me spouting all the amazing things of the new class on our drive home, my friend informed me that she would not be changing classes. She said that she felt she was to be in the class and that she was already being able to start applying all the things she was learning about marriage/preparing for it on she and her boyfriend's relationship. ... ! CLICK! I started to jab at her arm teasingly, that God put me in that class, knowing she would start coming months in. He knew she would come to my class. And once she was hooked to the class (that it is likely she would not have chosen to take)--she stayed and I was FREED and allowed to move on. Oh I tell you want... JOYFUL evening! I could not stop freaking out at how good the new class was for me. And among a few other things I learned, if the drudgery of institute was just so my friend could end up in the right class... I say Hallelujah! God knows us perfectly. Thank goodness toO!
 
There are so many more little things I could type but this will have to be all for now.
I report that I did my three part challenge. I read the conference ensign cover to cover right after the April 2012 General Conference. Then I started studying all the conference talks (one a day) going backwards with the prophets. I got back through 2000. What an amazing treat that was to read all of Monson's talks and then a bunch of President Hinckley's talks. Not only was the journey of studying just the prophet's talks insightful, it was deeply moving to see God's hand and hear God's words through His chosen vessels. I feel more clearer than ever that there is so much good stuff to be had! To be taken in! How can I waste any of my time when there are so many pearls and fair stones God would have me line my path and the path of others!?!
   I then did the part 3 challenge of re-reading all of the April talks right before the Oct General Conference. Seriously, the insight/revelation/pricking and stirrings of my heart have been intense over the last six months. Great challenge! I highly recommend trying it!
   General Conference was amazing! I highly recommend checking it out if you didn't have the chance too! Click Here to view God's words through his chosen tools!

I am grateful for repentance and fasting.